Live Your Life
by jalf1018
Summary: Melanie Karev Cassidy returns to Seattle Grace for her internship in the sequel to Wouldn't Be This Way. Rated T for later chapters.
1. Hello Seattle

**Live Your Life  
**

_Just live your life  
No telling where it'll take you  
Just live your life_

_I'll be honest. I never thought I'd be writing this story. When I reached the end of 'Wouldn't Be This Way', I thought I was finished. I put it in a box and tied a nice bow on it. Somehow the bow came undone and the story box opened itself up and here we are. I know some people liked the last one and I hope you all will like this one as well. _

_I am going to try and update at least once a week, but it could be more often depending on how many reviews I get. All the chapters in this story will be named after songs that relate to the chapter in varying degrees. However, there will be few chapters that the song will be a crucial part of the plot. In fact most of the time it will just be a line or two that I like and somehow vaguely relates. As far as the plot goes, there will be quite a few surprises. This first chapter isn't the best but regard it as a prolouge or catch up chapter. please enjoy and as always thank you for reading._

_**Disclaimer:**__ The characters from Grey's Anatomy and any lyrics used are the property of their respective owners. I claim no ownership. You could try to sue me, but as I am a college student, it really wouldn't be worth it._

**Chapter 1- Hello Seattle**

_Hello Seattle, I am a mountaineer  
In the hills and highlands  
I fall asleep in hospital parking lots_

It had been a long time since Melanie Karev Cassidy had been to the Seattle-Tacoma Airport. She remembered her first time. That had been nearly seventeen years ago. She had packed a small Barbie suitcase to go with her mother and grandmother to find her father. She had been in desperate need of a liver transplant. Through what some would call the grace of God, but what she would refer to as human kindness and good medicine, Melanie received a partial transplant from her father. After that she had moved to nearby Des Moines, Washington with her mother. Once there she spent nine happy years eventually finishing third in her class with her loving boyfriend, Clark Lee, as the valedictorian. That August she moved across the country to Ithaca, New York to attend an Ivy, Cornell. Throughout her undergrad she visited home whenever she had an extended break, hopping a cross-country red-eye flight. Her mother, father or one of her numerous "aunts" or "uncles" would pick her up excited to see her again.

However, she hadn't been home to Seattle in close to three years, since her sophomore year of med school. That year had been rough on her emotionally, though she had continued to excel in her studies. She broke up with Clark, fought with her mother (whom she had always told everything), and ended up transferring to the University of Buffalo medical school. Since then she couldn't bring herself to come home and face her mother. She tried to keep in touch with everyone else, but she had been a medical student trying to rise to the top of her class and they were surgeons who had unpredictable schedules. However she was back for good now. In two days, she would be starting her surgical residency at none other than Seattle Grace Hospital, the hospital in which this part of her life had started.

She looked around the baggage claim, hoping the airline hadn't lost the one bag she entrusted them with. It enough clothes to last another day. The bright green bag popped against the conveyor belt. The rest of her worldly processions were with her best friend Erin Meyer in a U-Haul van. Turning on her cell phone, Melly discovered that Erin was in Idaho and would be stopping at a motel in the eastern part of Washington tonight. With any luck, by tomorrow afternoon, they would be able to move their boxes into their new home. It had been the plan for them to make the cross-country trip together. However life had gotten in the way and Melanie had had to go to Iowa on family business before moving back to Seattle. _I'll have to remember to call her later_, Melanie thought as she walked towards the exit, wondering who was picking her up.

From across the crowded room she spied her Uncle Derek. Suddenly she wasn't so tired anymore and all but ran to him, dragging her suitcase behind her. "Uncle Derek," Melanie said in greeting. She was hugging him excitedly. While she had been hoping her dad would pick her up, any member of the family was a sight for sore eyes. "I suppose it isn't every intern who gets picked up by the Chief of Surgery?"

Derek smiled at his niece. He could remember when she was nine years old, in a pretty pink dress, walking down the aisle in front of Izzie. Now here she was, a grown woman. Where had the time gone? "You're right Melly, I'm not picking up all the interns, but not all of my new interns graduated first in their class." He grabbed her suitcase as they walked out to the car, Melly grinning the whole way.

"I also have a feeling that I will be the only intern who knows every department head, when it comes to surgery at least." Melly replied in a light tone as they strolled through the expansive parking lot.

Derek sighed, "You might be surprised."

"Really?" Melanie said. "Aunt Meredith is the head of neuro," she waited for him to nod yes and he did. Mer had held the position for two years now. "Daddy is the head of neonatal." Again Derek nodded yes. Alex had become head of the department after finishing his fellowship. "Izzie is the surgical head of oncology."She had changed her specialty after being diagnosed with stage two skin cancer twelve years ago. Not waiting for him to tell her she was right she went through the rest of her family "Aunt Christina is the head of cardio. Uncle Owen is the head of trauma. Aunt Callie is the head of ortho. Aunt Bailey is the head of general, until she takes your job at least. Uncle Mark is head of plastics."

Here Derek interrupted, "As of three o'clock today, he's not."

"Wait, when did this happen?" Melanie asked.

"He's going to work with your Aunt Lexie at her private practice. He'll still be around to do surgeries every now and then but he wants to be able to do more with the kids."

"How are all the little munchkins?" she asked.

"They're all growing up so fast," Derek replied. He and Meredith had one daughter named Caroline who was 10. Mark and Lexie had one daughter named Susan who was 5 and twin boys named Jackson and Jonathon who were 3. Christina and Owen had adopted a little girl from China a year ago named Lea.

"I hope I get to see them all before I start working," Melanie said.

They were approaching the house. "Izzie wanted it to be a surprise but she invited the whole family over for a welcome home dinner." Derek volunteered, knowing she'd notice the cars parked on the street.

"Thanks for the heads up," Melanie replied. She hated surprises. "Anything else I should know?"

_Besides the fact your estranged mother and stepfather are going to be there too? _"No," Derek replied nonchalantly. She stepped onto the sidewalk. It was like it had been three hours not years since she had last set eyes on it. She took her purse and suitcase in her hand. Derek slammed the trunk shut. "I'll be in the backyard with the men. I think Izzie and your aunts will be in the kitchen."

The words were lost on Melanie. She was already on the porch and opening the door.


	2. Who Says You Can't Go Home?

_Thank you all for reading and reviewing. I realized after getting one of the reviews, that I left some gaps in the explanations. Some of that was purposeful and other bits of it was that the characters and who they are, who they're related to, etc. are so stuck in my head that I didn't think about it. If I can ever help explain the story better, just leave a review or pm me. I promise I don't bite and will give you some sort of answer. Please enjoy and review. As always thank you for reading, Jen._

_**Disclaimer**_:_I do not claim to own any of the characters of Grey's Anatomy or the lyrics to this week's song "Who Says You Can't Go Home." Those belong to ABC and Bon Jovi, respectively. _

**Chapter 2- Who Says You Can't Go Home?**

_Who says you can't go home?  
There's only one place they call me one of their own._

Melanie was greeted by the smell of home style cooking when she opened the door. She dropped her purse and suitcase in the living room and walked towards the kitchen. She smiled when she saw her family. "Izzie, Aunt Mer, Aunt Christina, Aunt Lexie," she said as she hugged them in turn. "It's so good to see you all. I know it's my fault, but it has been far too long."

Izzie smiled at her step-daughter and replied, "It has been. I guess Derek ruined the surprise." Melly just nodded. "The whole family's here, except your father. You know what he says 'Babies wait…'"

"'For no one.' I know." Melly completed the familiar saying, having heard it often throughout her life.

"I think we might have surprised her anyway," said a voice from behind her. The voice was a familiar one despite not having heard it in years.

Melly spun around. "You certainly have Mother," she said as she tried to keep a smile on her face, though it didn't go past the surface.

Kathleen hadn't seen her daughter since Christmas, nearly three years ago. They hadn't spoken since Melanie had told her a secret that Kathleen couldn't support. That day Melly had packed up her suitcase and spent the remainder of her break at her father's. That had been the last time Melanie had bothered to come out to Seattle at all. Kathleen now offered her daughter a similarly hollow smile. "Izzie do you mind if I steal Melly for a few moments," Kathleen asked not giving her daughter the option of refusal.

"Of course," Izzie replied. "Alex just texted me a few minutes ago saying he's just out of surgery, so dinner won't be for another fifteen minutes at least. I made your favorite Melly; filet mignon."

"Thanks," Melanie replied before she was dragged out of the room by her mother.

"Well," Meredith started after mother and daughter were safely in the living room. "That was certainly awkward."

"You know they haven't talked in close to three years," Lexie offered. Gossip was still the de rigueur at Seattle Grace.

"She didn't even know Melanie was coming back to Seattle until Alex told her." Christina divulging what Alex had told her during a particularly long surgery the day before.

"They both have too much pride to apologize and neither will admit what they fought over," Izzie said sadly. "The poor dears don't realize we know they still aren't on speaking terms."

"It breaks my heart every time I see Katie's face when she hears the latest about Melly and she tries to pretend it's not news." Lexie said equally concerned, "I hope they work it out."

"I hope so too," agreed Izzie. "That's why I invited Kathleen over. I've known Melly since she was a little girl. She's not going to do anything to move forward on her own."

As all this was being said, Melanie was facing her mother in the living room, oblivious to what was being said only yards away. "Mom, you really did surprise me," she said simultaneously acidic and pleasant with a fake smile on her lips.

"So this is how we're going to play it?" Kathleen asked her tone and her features genuinely disappointed.

"Are you going to apologize?" Melanie asked as Kathleen remained silent. After waiting a moment for a response but receiving none, Melly continued bitterly "Then yes, this is how we're going to 'play it.'" Her eyes wandered looking for an escape from the situation. "I should move my stuff up to my room, it's in the way here."

Unfortunately for Melanie, her mother followed her upstairs to a light gray bedroom. "Is this where you'll be living?" she asked.

"No," Melanie said tersely until she saw the hurt on her mother's face. Offering her mother more information like a dog a bone she continued, "Dad found a place for me and my friend Erin. She'll be along tomorrow with our stuff. I had to go to Iowa for a few weeks, you know. I'm sure Grandma told you."

"I heard about your Grandpa Charlie. Is Erin from Buffalo," Kathleen asked. "Or wasn't I supposed to know you transferred to UB half way through med school?"

Melanie resisted the urge to pick a fight. "Yeah, Erin's from Buffalo, born and raised." A moment of silence passed. "I told Dad to tell you about Buffalo. Even if I wasn't going to talk to you, I still thought you had a right to know."

"Thanks. Why did you transfer?" Kathleen asked.

"UB has a great oncology program since Roswell Park is so close," Melanie answered purposefully. That was the reason she had given her father over two years ago when he asked the same question.

Kathleen let the answer set for a moment before asking, "Were things awkward between you and Clark after…"

"Mother," Melanie interrupted her face livid before being interrupted by her father's voice downstairs. She allowed her features to relax and made a transformation of mood so sudden anyone but those who knew her temper would be disturbed. "Daddy's home. We'll probably be eating soon. Will Ted be joining us?"

Kathleen, realizing that any personal reasons for Melly's transfer were off limits to her, simply answered the question at hand, "He's out back with the other men. Izzie has them grilling the steaks."

They both started walking down the stairs. "You know, I always liked Ted. He's good for you." Melanie offered as a truce.

"Did you hear we're having a baby finally?" Kathleen asked excitedly.

"No I didn't. I thought you guys had stopped trying." Melanie replied thoughtfully.

"We did," nearly twelve years of trying had broken her heart once a month. "We're due in December. I'm 5 months along. We're having a boy."

"Well I'm happy for you," Melly said wanting to drop the topic of babies.

At the bottom of the stairs another voice aided her in that goal. "Is that my Melly Belly?" Alex asked playfully. Despite having a second child, Michael, Melanie would always be his little girl.

"It sure is Daddy," answered Melanie, hugging him as excited as the young girl who had earned the nickname.

"How has my little doctor been?" Alex asked, leading her to the kitchen, almost forgetting that Katie was behind them.

"Fine, you heard about Grandpa Charlie, right?" Melanie asked, knowing her father's feelings about his own father.

"Yeah, I heard. How he survived that long is beyond me." Alex said bitterly. There had never been any love lost between him and his father "Answer one question for me and then let's not talk about it anymore. What happened to the house?"

"He left it to me. I knew how you'd feel about it, so I sold it. It went really fast. I paid some of my student loans with the money." Melanie answered anxious for the reaction.

But Alex smiled, "I'm glad something good came out of that hell hole. You paying off loans is probably one of the best things that could have happened."

"Speaking of houses," Melanie began, changing the topic, "how's my place?"

"It's nice. I'll take you there after dinner, unless you want to wait for Erin?" Alex said.

"She'll be here in the morning, so I'll just wait until then." Melanie didn't want to rush the last family time she'd have before starting her internship.

"Guys, dinner's ready," came Izzie's voice from the dining room. Everybody filed in and engaged in harmless small talk, not mentioning the tension between mother and daughter that could be cut with a butter knife; not mentioning the fact that Alex had skipped his own father's funeral. They talked about the weather and the latest antics of the smaller children who were eating in the other room. It was simply lovely.

Later on that night after the desert plates had been cleared and every one had left, Melanie got around to calling Erin.

"Hey Mel," answered the voice from the other end.

"Hey Eir," Melanie said returning the greeting. "How was the drive?"

"Eh. All right, I hate driving through mountains. Did you see the place yet?" Erin asked.

"Not yet. I'm going in the morning." Melanie answered. "My dad said it's really nice."

"Did you get the price for this really nice place yet?" Erin asked.

"No, he's trying to pretend that I don't need to know." Melanie replied. "I texted you the address, right?"

"Yes, you did. I'm going to try and leave real early in the morning. So I'll see you when I get there, I'm guessing around noon." Erin said, saying her goodbyes.

"Sounds great, see you then." Melanie said before hanging up. Now that she had talked to Erin, there was nothing left to do but sleep and dream.


	3. Moving On Up

_Thank you everyone for reading and reviewing. I really do appreciate it. In this next chapter we get to meet Mike, Melanie's brother (Izzie and Alex's son) and Erin, Melanie's friend from Buffalo. I will be completely honest: Erin, the character, is loosely based on my sister, Erin. On with the story and as always thank you, Jennifer_

**Disclaimer:** I don't own the characters from GA or the limited song lyrics included...in case you couldn't guess.

**Chapter 3- Moving On Up**

_Well we're moving on up,  
To the east side,  
To a deluxe apartment in the sky._

The next morning Izzie and Alex were in the kitchen. She was cooking a breakfast of pancakes and eggs while he was reading the latest neonatal journal, until someone walked through the back door.

"Hey Mom and Dad," said Michael Karev. He had been with some friends for a final camping trip before school would start.

"You're early Mike," said Alex. He hadn't been expecting Mike to come home until the late morning.

"It's already 10:30," replied Mike. "Did Mel come in last night?"

"She did" Izzie replied, giving her only son a plate of pancakes. "Should we go wake her up?"

"No need," Melanie said answering Izzie's question from the opposite direction. "I don't know why but I guess I just needed to sleep in this morning. I never intended to sleep this late. Erin said she'd be at the apartment around noon, so for her that means 11:30," she continued as she poured herself cup of coffee.

"Enjoy sleeping in while you can," joked Alex. "You won't be sleeping much at all for the next year."

"You're right," Melanie conceded. "So Mike, are you looking forward to your senior year?"

"Yeah, I'm mostly taking electives, so that will be cool," he started. He went on to tell her what classes he was taking but Melanie was just caught up in the fact her baby brother was a senior in high school. Looking at him, she could see that he looked just like their father, where she had always looked more like her mother.

They continued having a family breakfast until Melanie caught sight of the clock. "Dad, it's already 11:30. We should get going."

Alex reluctantly grabbed his car keys. "I guess you're right. Mike, since you're home anyway, come and help your sister move in."

"Ok," the younger Karev responded as the three walked out and piled into a Lexus crossover.

"How far away is it?" Melanie asked.

"It's five minutes towards the hospital," answered Alex as he turned on the car and slipped out of the driveway. "You'll like it. It's in a decent neighborhood. It has a great kitchen, two bedrooms, a study… What else?" he asked himself trying to remember all the amenities.

"How much is rent per month, Dad? You still haven't told me that," Melanie asked.

"Well, between you and Erin, I'm sure you can afford it," he responded.

"I still need a number," she replied. She had been asking for a definitive price for a month since her father had told her that he had found her a place.

"She's not going to like this," Mike interjected, knowing the rent and how much Mel had intended to spend.

"What am I not going to like" Melanie questioned, but before anyone could answer her cell phone rang. "Wait a second, it's Erin," she told her father.

Erin's voice came in clearly from the speaker. "I know I said noon, but I'm early. Where are you?"

"I'm almost there. I brought my dad and brother to help us move." Melanie responded.

"Great. See you in a minute." Erin said before hanging up the phone.

Melanie continued where she left off with her father. "How much? I have to be able to tell Erin when I see her in a minute."

Alex realizing he was going to have to come clean with the price "I know you said a thousand was the limit. I assumed that each of you were going to pay a grand so I found a place for $1500."

"A month?" Melanie exclaimed incredulous. "Are you serious?"

"I clearly assumed wrong. Izzie and I can help you and I'm sure your mother would…" Alex was cut off by Melanie.

"No. I don't want to be living off my daddy's money forever and I certainly don't want to ask my mother. I know you'll always think of me as your little girl, but I'm an independent woman," Melanie said.

At that Alex pulled up in front of a Victorian looking townhouse. "Here we are. Is that Erin?" he asked indicating towards the truck with the U-haul trailer behind.

"That's her," she said as she opened the door. "We finally made it Eir."

Her friend rushed up towards her "It's about time. I love this place. It's so cute. It reminds me of my grandparent's house. I can't believe it's less than a thousand a month." Erin rambled as was her tendency.

Melanie just smiled. It was a nice place. They would just have to figure out some way to come up with an extra $500 a month when they had other bills to pay on an intern's salary. She could wait until the stuff was moved in to break that news to her. "Erin I want you to meet my dad and my brother Mike."

Erin replied in a polite voice "It's nice to meet you two."

Alex smiled back. So far his daughter's new roommate was acceptable. "It's nice to meet you too Erin. Melanie has told us a lot about you."

"Should we start moving stuff in?" Mike asked, not wanting to be there all day.

"Sure," Melanie replied. She and Erin didn't have too many things in the trailer. Just a few boxes of clothes each, a few boxes of medical journals and books, a box of photo albums, and a few more boxes of the requisite house items that they all knew they wouldn't have time to use for a long while. Alex had managed to rummage up some old furniture from the family, so Erin hadn't had to cart that cross-country. It wasn't much but it was enough for the time being.

By four o'clock, they had finished moving everything in and had quite a bit put away. Alex had ordered in a pizza. "How do you like it," he asked Erin. She tended to be quiet so he had been unsure.

She swallowed the bite in her mouth. "It's good," she said, not wanting to offend by saying that it wasn't like the pizza at home.

"Melly, told me that you wanted to specialize in neonatal," Alex said.

Erin replied, "Yeah, I've always loved little babies. Mel told me you're the head of the department."

"I am. I suppose I'll be seeing you quite a bit," he responded.

They continued eating. Melanie wanted to get Erin alone when she told her the price. "Dad, you and Mike should probably get going. Erin and I have to go to that mixer for the new interns."

"Right," Alex said taking the hint. He and Mike left shortly after.

"So I didn't want to ask in front of your dad but how much is this place going to cost us?" Erin asked when the Karevs were safely out the door. "I have trouble believing that this is less than a thousand a month."

Melanie swallowed, "That would be because it's not."

Erin's face fell, "Melly, you know I can't afford any more than $500 a month. That was already going to be really tight. How much more is it?"

"It's $1500. My dad apparently misunderstood." Melanie stated simply.

"What are we going to do? I love this place but still…" Erin let her words hang in the air.

"We could get another roommate. We don't need a study and there are two bathrooms, so it won't be too crowded," Mel suggested.

Erin huffed a little. This hadn't been how she pictured living in Seattle, but she replied "If we find the right person, but if we don't I'm going to have to move."

"We'll find the right person. We can try asking at the mixer tonight to see if anyone is looking for a place," Melanie suggested.

"Ok, we should start getting ready then." Erin completed. She walked upstairs to figure out which outfit to wear to the mixer that evening. Maybe that new purple halter dress would work. It was a little sporty but she felt it was acceptable to meet her new colleagues in.


	4. Ain't That a Kick in the Head?

_I'd like to again thank everyone for reading and reviewing. I really, really appreciate it, especially when people give me feedback. I have a pretty good idea of where I want the story to go, but reviews will make the creative process a lot easier. This may be the last update this week because I am going to Washington D.C. this weekend for a totally awesome rally! The earliest I'll have anything up is Sunday evening, unless I get enough reviews. In which case, I'll post the already written Chapter 5 during the day on Friday._

_Thank you and as always thanks for reading- Jen._

**Disclaimer**: I do not own the characters from Grey's Anatomy or the lyrics to this chapter's song.

**Chapter 4- Ain't That a Kick in the Head?**

_Tell me quick,  
ain't that a kick in the head?_

There were only going to be three female interns that year, in a class of twelve. Seattle Grace's reputation allowed it to select only the best of the best. Hannah Klein, one of those three, stood near the corner with a soda in her hand. She hadn't known what to wear to a cocktail party hosted by her future workplace. She had worn a dressy pair of shorts and a longer button-down shirt belted in the middle. Hannah had model looks; long tanned legs and long blonde hair which had fit in perfectly in Santa Monica and Los Angeles, but among these other doctors looked alien. She was hoping that the other two female interns were not the bitchy kind. Though she was friendly, most women decided to hate her before they knew her.

Almost as if they were summoned two more women entered the room. The one was average height and build with dirty blonde hair. She was wearing an athletic looking but still nice dress. Her companion was shorter but lean with sunny red hair, wearing a blue vintage looking dress that could be considered too tight. The blonde walked towards the opposite wall, but the redhead walked towards her. She smiled and introduced herself, "Hi, I'm Melanie Cassidy."

Hannah smiled back when she saw that there was no malice in the sea green eyes "Hannah Klein. It's nice to meet one of the two other women in the program."

"It's nice to meet you too. Where are you from?" Melanie asked hoping it would be from out of the area, increasing the likelihood of her needing a place.

"Santa Monica; I actually went to UCLA though." Hannah replied. "You?"

"Originally Iowa, then I moved out here to Seattle but I went to Cornell and UB. I've been all over." Melanie replied lightly.

"I just moved up here. I'm still looking for a place. The nice places are too expensive for me to afford on my own and the places I can afford are in the worse neighborhoods." Hannah replied.

Melanie tried not to let her eyes open up too wide. "I know exactly what you mean. My dad actually found me and my roommate Erin a townhouse and it was a lot more than we wanted to spend. We are actually looking for another roommate if you're interested."

"I only want to spend $800 a month though," Hannah said nervously.

"How does $500 a month sound," Melanie smiled.

"Perfect, but I should probably meet Erin first," Hannah responded.

Mel sighed and chuckled, "She'll probably want to meet you before I can tell you that you can move in anyway. She has these priorities, like not living with a serial killer." Hannah giggled at the sarcasm as Melanie texted Erin a quick message and almost at once a she joined the group.

"I'm Erin Meyer," Erin said taking in her potential roommate.

"Hannah Klein," the blonde responded. "Melanie told me you guys need another roommate and I need a place to live."

"Can you clean or cook?" Erin asked. She was unsure about Barbie, but would be willing to give her a fair chance.

Hannah grinned, "I'm kind of a compulsive cleaner and I bake really great muffins."

"She'll do great," Erin said as a loud aside to Melanie. "When do you want to move in?"

"How about after the first shift? I just have a few things." Hannah answered. "Where are you from Erin?"

"Buffalo, New York. I went to UB for eight years, so when it was time to do my internship I just wanted to go far, far away." Erin replied. Hannah was beginning to notice her roommate's elongated vowels.

"I'm going to get a drink; do either of you guys want anything?" Melanie asked.

"I'm fine," Hannah replied, taking a sip of her soda.

"Just grab me a pop," replied Erin. "I'm not drinking tonight."

"Okay," Melanie said as she turned towards the bar. She was going to take the other girls' lead, no need to get carried away like she was wont to do. She put in her and Erin's orders and stood by waiting for the bartender. For a short moment she thought of the day ahead of her tomorrow.

"Melanie?" asked a male voice from behind her, interrupting those thoughts. "It's me, Clark." Melanie froze. "Clark Lee." Melanie turned around. It was indeed her ex-boyfriend from high school and college and her first year and a half of medical school.

Melanie smiled one of her fake smiles, but her eyes had darkened. "It's so great to see you."

"You don't have to look so happy about it Mel." Clark said sarcastically. "Of course you got into the program," he continued bitterly.

Melanie dropped the pretenses and her eyes took on an almost feline expression, "I don't have time for this Clark. In fact I have to go." The bartender had just set the drinks on the bar. Not batting another eyelash, she turned and walked away.

He just watched her. It had been over two, nearly three, years since she had left him. He had been angry at her for most of that time, but seeing her again had refreshed his memory. Why did he have to ruin it with the bitterness that had been long gone? He would see her again soon. The hospital and the surgical wing in particular weren't so large that she could avoid him forever.

Melanie didn't share that opinion. She would do her best to avoid him starting now. She gave Erin her drink and quickly swallowed hers. "He's here, Eir. Clark is here. He got into the program and apparently he still hates me."

"Who?" Hannah asked.

Erin filled her in quickly, "Clark Lee. He was Mel's boyfriend for about seven years."

"Eight," corrected Melanie. "Then I left him when I transferred to UB. We had issues." What those issues were she wasn't about to tell Hannah yet.

"It's a small world isn't it?" Hannah replied ironically.

"Too small," Melanie answered. "I'm going to go across the street. There's a bar called Joe's. Pick me up when you're ready to leave or I'll grab a cab and text you."

"Ok," Erin answered to Melanie's back.

Hannah leaned towards Erin's ear. "Is she always like that?" Melanie's mood had changed so quickly.

Erin thought quickly for the most diplomatic answer. "No, she just really wasn't expecting to see him," letting the thought _normally she doesn't stay that calm. _"It's a long story."

"I'm sure she'll tell me sometime if she wants to," Hannah said. "So what specialty are you going into?" she asked, changing the subject.

"Neonatal," Erin answered. "You?"

"I'm not sure yet, maybe neuro but for now I'm just general." Hannah responded. She could tell that she was going to like Erin, but she still wasn't sure about Melanie. Somehow Hannah suspected that Melanie's mood swings were going to have quite a bit of drama.


	5. Rockin' the Beer Gut

_As promised here is Chapter 5. This was a very fun chapter to write so I hope you all enjoy it. Please leave me reviews. I won't have Chapter 6 up any earlier than Sunday evening, because I'll be in DC promoting my political beliefs._

_Thank you and as always thanks for reading- Jen._

**Disclaimer**: I do not own the characters from Grey's Anatomy or the lyrics to this chapter's song.

**Chapter 5- Rockin' the Beer Gut**

_5 foot something cherry bomb _

_She had everything going on  
The first thing that caught my eye_

Joe's was not completely unfamiliar territory for Melanie. The last time she was home, all those years ago, after she left her mother's for the last time she had gone to there for a few drinks. It was the type of place she liked to go, quiet and intimate. She strolled up to the bar, "One shot of vodka, please."

Joe looked surprised that the rather small woman in front of him was going to drink straight vodka, but he poured the drink as ordered, setting it on the bar. Melanie's fingers wrapped around the cool glass. She tipped her head back and felt a familiar burn as the contents slipped down her throat. She thought about Clark. He was still angry but she couldn't exactly blame him.

A stranger sat next to her as she ordered a second shot. "You are going to be miserable in the morning," he said.

Melanie shot him a look and downed the shot. "I have a feeling I'll be miserable in the morning either way," she smiled. He couldn't be called cute. He had far too much sex appeal to simply be called cute. He reminded her of what her Uncle Mark or her Uncle Derek had looked like when she had first arrived in Seattle. "I may as well enjoy how I get there."

He appraised the girl next to him. She was different from his usual type but he doubted that there were many models living in Seattle. Nowhere near as many as there had been in New York. Besides there was just something enthralling about her. Maybe it was the fiery red hair or the cool aqua eyes, but he couldn't tear away his own baby blues from her. "Can I buy you a drink," he paused as if to ask her name.

Not missing the hint she continued for him "Mel, and yes you may." How could she refuse a drink from such a handsome man? "I'll have a gimlet and your name."

"Dan's the name," he replied to her and turned his attention to the bartender for a brief moment. "The lady will have a gimlet and I'll have a double scotch." Joe thought to himself that this chance meeting in a bar was like déjà-vu, but he couldn't place it.

"So Dan what do you do," Melanie asked. Her demeanor relaxed.

"Would you be impressed if I told you I was a doctor?" That trick usually worked with girls. Back in New York he was a frequent guest on a local news station as their medical advisor. He was an excellent surgeon in his own right but the show had given him notoriety. When his old resident had called him with a job opportunity, head of plastic surgery no less, he decided he could easily give up his New York style of living.

Melanie quietly chuckled. "Not one bit."

For a second Dan looked dumbfounded. "Really?"

"I'm a doctor myself, and so is almost everyone else in my family." She provided as Joe provided the drinks that had been ordered. Dan sat back impressed and took a sip of his drink. She had hardly looked old enough to be in medical school, much less be a doctor already. "Surprised?" she asked with an edge of sarcasm.

"No, a lady like you has to be pretty smart; classy too," he smoothly replied, a Southern drawl creeping into his voice. Mel just smiled at him and took a sip of her drink. In the back of her mind she thought that the drink must be weak. She couldn't taste any vodka. What she had forgotten when she ordered the drink that gimlets are usually made with gin. She had also forgotten that gin was her weakness. She could handle any drink thrown at her, but gin made her unusually affectionate.

"So where are you from?" she asked. "Somewhere classy I'm sure."

"I'm originally from Charleston. I lived in New York for the past five or so years, and I just moved out here for work."

"What part of New York?" In the eight years she lived throughout Upstate New York, she no longer recognized New York as just meaning the city. It was a whole state after all.

"The Upper West Side. Are you from New York?" he asked.

"No. I just spent the last couple years Upstate. I'm originally from Iowa, but lived right around Seattle for about half my life." She downed the rest of her drink as a country song crooned from the jukebox. "Do you want to dance?"

"I only dance with the most beautiful girls," he replied cheekily.

"Then you're in luck. One of them is asking you," she said as she grabbed his hand and took him out to the dance floor. As the rhythm took them, he looked at her with admiration. Never had he been so taken by a girl. She was young, self-assured, and intelligent; a picture of what he had always been looking for in a woman but had never taken the time to look for. Certainly she would never fall for his methods.

She interrupted his thoughts. "Has anyone ever called you Danny boy?" Her eyes sparkled at him. It might be the booze or it might be love.

"I can't say anyone ever has," he laughed.

As the night progressed they shared a few more drinks. She looked through her purse to find her phone to check the time. It was close to midnight. Not too late, but still not too early. "This has been great Danny boy, but I have an early day of work tomorrow," she informed him.

"It was nice to meet you Mel." He would probably call it a night soon too. Damned hospital had such early hours.

Melanie just looked at him. "Aren't you going to offer to take me home?" she said sweetly.

"What kind of gentleman would I be if I did that?" he asked with faux indigination.

Melanie suppressed a giggle, poorly. "You would be my kind of gentleman. So do you?"

"Want to take you home?" Dan was surprised. She seemed like such a classy girl; one who would not be going home with some random guy. "Of course I want to take you home."

She smiled at him, her eyes bright. "Then let's get going."

On the car ride to her house, she texted Erin to tell her that she had found a ride home and that she'd see her in the morning. Each minute felt ten times longer. Both were quiet with anticipation. When they finally arrived she led him by the hand into the house. Noting that the lights were still out in the house, his lips crashed against hers. She looked into his eyes. They dared him with a smoldering light and with that he allowed himself to be led upstairs.


	6. Last Name

_It has been a long time since my last update. I'm sorry for that but I have been insanely busy. Currently, my classes and pledging A∆__E own my life. That is why I am taking a slight hiatus. I hope to put up a chapter while I'm on fall break and after I finish pledging (which should be by the end of the month) I should return to a more normal schedule. The good news is that I have the next 15 chapters or so planned, so its simply a matter of writing it. This chapter picks up where the last one left off. It also covers the first part of the new intern's first day._

_Thank you and as always thanks for reading~ Jen_

**Disclaimer**: I do not own the characters or quotes from Grey's Anatomy or the lyrics to this chapter's song.

**Chapter 6- Last Name**

_It started off "Hey cutie, where ya from?"  
And then it turned in,  
"Oh no, what have I done?"  
And I don't even know his last name_

Melanie wouldn't say her head was pounding, but that stranger at the bar last night had been right. She felt miserable. The alarm clock next to her head going off was making matters worse. With a quiet groan she began to tear herself out of bed. That was when it hit her. Like the first minute of any given episode of a television show, last night was recapped in bits and pieces. Looking to her left, she saw him. She cringed when she remembered that she called this impeccably attractive man Danny Boy the night before. She must have gotten carried away last night to say the least. She jumped in the shower quickly trying not to walk him up. Maybe she could sneak out before he woke up. Yes, that was an excellent plan. He had clearly seen her at her most humiliating. There was no reason she could think of for him to see her again. In the shower with steam swirling around her she thought about how she would explain him to Erin. Perhaps it just wasn't necessary. Patting herself dry and wrapping a towel around herself, she walked back into her bedroom.

He was awake, "Good morning, you could have woken me up to join you in the shower."

She had forgotten about the drawl. "About last night… I don't normally do that type of thing." He continued to stare at her, making her painfully aware that the only thing between her skin and his eyes was a ratty old towel. "We don't have to see each other again."

His mouth dropped open for a second, so short that she missed it. "I believe we will Mel." He knew that he wouldn't be able to resist the apple now that he had taken a bite.

"No we won't," she replied snidely. "I'm a medical intern and today is my first day. So if you don't mind I need to go. You can either leave now before my roommate is up and leaving, or you can wait until we're both gone. So it was a pleasure, but all good things must come to an end."

"No more Danny boy?" he asked. Melanie huffed a little. This man was positively infuriating but at the same time exhilarating.

She smiled at him with a hint of sarcasm. "Never, ever again. Now so long, Daniel."

Dan could see that he was fighting a losing battle. "I'll leave now so you can get dressed, but we will be meeting again." At that he walked out the door; he had to be at the hospital in two hours anyways. As he opened the door at the bottom of the stairs to leave, a pair of eyes silently peered into his back. However, he didn't see her and Erin didn't say a word. As the door shut quietly behind him Erin walked upstairs and knocked on Melanie's door.

"Come in," said Mel's voice from the other side of the door.

"I was just checking if you were up and ready yet." Erin said nonchalantly as she walked into the room. "You must have had a late night."

Mel finished pulling on a sweater. "I got in before you last night."

"Oh, so you and that guy didn't sleep together?" Erin was an expert at subtly condemning.

Mel knew she had to bite the bullet. "I know I said I'd stop doing that kind of thing, but it happens." Erin just smirked smugly. "Ok, fine. After I saw Clark, I had a few. Dan, that guy, was just really nice and," Mel paused. "Did you see him? He's a genuine hottie, plus he has an adorable southern accent. It wasn't my proudest moment but I could have done worse."

"That is very true," Erin replied. "Remember that one guy you picked up on Chippewa? He had serial killer written all over him."

Mel just laughed, "We're both still alive, and he wasn't on the news for another two months. So moving on from my past exploits, did you talk to Hannah more last night?"

"Yeah, we're thinking of going out for drinks after our shift and then bringing her boxes up."

"Sounds good. When does our shift end again?"

"Tomorrow at 7. That'll be fun." Erin grinned.

"The long days will be worth it when we're done. Anyway we signed up for it." Melanie glanced at the clock. They had twenty minutes to be there. "We should probably get going."

Erin agreed and they made their way down to the truck. The ride to the hospital was quiet, but appropriate. Though Mel knew the hospital like the back of her hand, the expectation was that the new interns wouldn't. There were hand drawn signs pointing the new crew to the locker room that would be theirs until they became residents in a year. The room smelled stale and reminded Erin of the locker room in her high school. The one that hadn't been renovated since the 80's that had lockers that wouldn't lock. She opened the locker with her name on the door. Inside the door was a heart in sharpie, _Stevens + Karev_. "Mel, look at this," Erin said across a bench dividing the twin rows.

Melanie looked at what Erin was pointing out. "That would be Dad and Izzie. This must have been her locker, it's her writing." This was just the first sign of many that told Mel that it would be impossible to pretend, for very long anyway, that she was just another intern without any connections. The only thing that would have helped was she was a Cassidy, not a Karev. She pulled on the sweater she had put on not that long ago and pulled a scrub top over the tight tee shirt she was left with. Hannah walked into the room with a cup of coffee, already decked out in light blue.

"Hey guys," she beamed. Hannah was a morning person. "I hope we're in the same group."

"That would be great," Mel started. "But as long as I'm not stuck with Clark all day, every day, however they want to do it is fine by me."

Another person walked into the door, though it was obvious he wasn't an intern, or a resident. "Gather around everyone," Derek Shepherd said. "For those of you who don't know me, I'm Dr. Shepherd, Chief of Surgery. I'm not to be confused with Dr. Grey-Shepherd, who is head of neuro. It helps that I'm usually just called the Chief." The interns stood with awe. He was one of the developers of the Shepherd-Grey method. Of course the other Dr. Shepherd was the Grey portion of the name.

He continued, "I have your resident assignments, so listen up. Drs. Cassidy, Klein, Lee and Meyers, you will be with Dr. Reilly. So you can go out and meet him in front of the nurses' station." As the first four interns left the room, Melanie was the only one who was unhappy with this result. Erin and Hannah were happy to be in the same group and Clark was happy to make it harder for Mel to avoid him. Melanie was just pissed. The only good part was that rumor had it Reilly was the new Bailey. He had been recognized as the best intern in his class and expected no less from his own interns. This would be the second group to enter his mentorship. The last group had all quit, unable to handle the pressures of his brand of teaching.

But as the approached the deceptively cuddly man, Mel was the only one privy to this information. As Clark reached out a hand, she kept her mouth shut and watched what she knew would happen. "I'm Clark Lee. I graduated third in my class from Cornell." His hand hung there as Reilly stared at it.

"I have five rules," he started ignoring the greeting. "Rule number one, don't bother sucking up. I already hate you, that's not going to change. I know what you all were and that's why I picked you for my crew. You may have skated through med school and college with a 4.0 but here that means nothing. You can know every theory, but if you can't act on them, you're useless to me. These patients are trusting you with their lives, granted they don't have much of a choice, but they still trust you. Don't disappoint them. Which brings me to rule number two; you will answer every single page at as fast a speed as possible."

They looked down at their new pagers and followed Reilly to the on-call room. "Sleep when you can where you can. The on-call room is for sleeping only. Rule three: When I'm sleeping you don't wake me unless a patient is dying and when I get there the patient had better still be alive. Otherwise it's your ass." Hannah, Erin and Clark shared the same nervous look. "That's rule four. Finally rule five, when I move you move. Any questions?"

Predictably, no one raised their hands. They only followed him to start their first set of rounds.


	7. First Impressions

_I'm back… This is a shorter chapter, but I'm super excited for Chapter 8 so I wanted to get this chapter out of the way. I have two additional disclaimers. 1) I don't guarantee that any medical information is right. I did some research but I'm not a med student, nor will I ever be one. Tell me if there's a huge error so I'll know for future reference. 2) I don't know Spanish, so that is only an internet translation. I apologize for any grammatical mistakes. I provided a translation at the bottom of the story, but it's not an integral part of the story. There is no song this chapter, because I couldn't find one that fit the chapter. Instead I've included a quote. I've already started Ch. 8 so look for that later this week. Please leave a review and I'll try to get it up faster. _

_Thank you and as always thanks for reading- Jen._

**Disclaimer**: I do not own the characters or quotes from Grey's Anatomy.

**Chapter 7: First Impressions**

_It is not only old and early __impressions__ that deceive us; _

_the charms of novelty have the same power_

_~Blaise Pascal~_

As the interns approached the first room they all felt nervous. This would be their first patient on their first rounds on their first shift. How they presented could effect the rest of their medical careers. In the hospital bed laid a slight, heart faced woman. By her side with a look of expectation was Christina Yang in a white coat and dark blue scrubs, denoting her proper position as Seattle Grace's cardio-god. "Who's presenting?" she asked in an aloof voice.

Reilly brought her chart to the top of the pile and began, "Maria Corizone, age 26. She was brought in last night with angina. We're still running tests to see what her diagnosis is. We ran an EKG last night but found the results of it to be inconclusive. The only thing it eliminated was an ordinary heart attack"

"What are some possible diagnoses?" Yang asked trying to be a decent teacher. "You," she pointed at Clark. His eyes opened wide with panic. "Do you have any thoughts?"

"If it's not a case of coronary blockage, my next instinct would be to do a chest x-ray in order to eliminate the possibility of tumors on the heart or lungs," he said in a grasping tone, avoiding eye contact.

"Are you sure," Yang asked. "How about you? What do you think," pointing at Melanie.

"It's likely a case of valvular stenosis. I would proceed by doing an echocardiogram and from there we could explore treatment options based on the severity of the condition," she replied with a cool confidence.

"Arrange the test then. Dr. Reilly, I'd like to see Dr. Cassidy here on my service today. The rest of your interns may proceed to the next case." Following behind Reilly the rest of the interns filed out of the room.

After they had left Melanie began work, "Don't worry ma'am. We're going to take good care of you," smiling at the patient. Within hours Melanie was able to get Maria in and out of the test. Results in hand she then went to find Christina. "Dr. Yang, I have the results back." Turning from her cup of coffee, Christina looked over the results as Melanie narrated. "The test reveals that her mitral valve is leaking."

"What would you do?" Christina asked.

"I would advise surgery," Melanie said. "Though if need be the patient could wait."

"Then let's go talk with Ms. Corizone." Christina said abandoning her coffee.

As they walked in Maria was talking on her cell phone. "Entiendo, mi amor. Es sólo un mes extra," she noticed the doctors come in. "Me tengo que ir, los médicos están aquí. Si, te amo demasiado."* She flipped the phone shut. "It was my husband. He was supposed to be coming back from Pakistan in a week but the army didn't grant him his leave yet."

"I'm sorry to hear that. We found out what is wrong with your heart. You have what is termed as vacular stenosis, which is basically a leaking valve. It can be repaired with a simple surgery." Christina said. "This is something that we like to fix sooner rather than later, so we can have you in surgery as soon as this afternoon."

"Do you have any concerns ma'am before we schedule an operation?" Melanie asked.

"I realize this should be on my charts but I forgot to add it yesterday in all the hubbub. I'm two months pregnant. I just found out the other day. I just told my husband today."

Christina paused. "That may be a problem. We can't do the surgery while you are pregnant and this is something that may become much worse as your pregnancy progresses."

"What options do I have?" asked Maria, her skin growing paler.

"One option would be to terminate the pregnancy and receive the operation. It would be a simple procedure. Otherwise, your only option is to wait and hope that it doesn't kill you in the next seven months." Melanie said.

"I can't. I simply can't." Maria said her eyes welling with tears.

"We'll let you think about it for a while," Christina said. The two doctors left the room. "I don't think there's going to be a surgery for this case."

"She does understand that this is probably going to kill her before the baby can be born? We could get a translator and make sure." Melanie said. Her first day and already she couldn't help her patient. "What would you do?"

Christina thought for a moment. "If I were her age, I would probably go for the surgery. If someone asked me that question now, I would probably take my chances."

"I would get the abortion. There can always be more babies." Melanie said, trying not to think back to the choices she had made.

"I understand what she's thinking. Her husband is in a war zone, and God only knows if he'll be back. In her mind this may be the only part of him she can keep." Christina countered. "Just give her a few hours and see if I'm not right. If she says no though, that's going to be the end of it. Have her discharge papers ready, because there won't be anything we can do. Understand, Dr. Cassidy."

"Yes, Dr. Yang," Mel said to her back. She then went to find the papers she hoped she wouldn't need.

_* "I understand, love. It's only an extra month…I have to go, the doctors are here. Yes, I love you too."_


	8. Song of the South

_This is probably my favorite chapter thus far. It actually reveals what Melanie's and Clark's history was together. It also verges on a crossover with Gone with the Wind, my other obsession, but there'll only be strains of a Rhett-Scarlett relationship. It won't be enough to have to put it into a crossover category. Please let me know what you think, and if you want more of these kinds of chapters, in essence click the pretty green button and leave me a review. Chapter 9 should be up early next week._

_Thank you and as always thanks for reading- Jen._

**Disclaimer**: I do not own the characters or quotes from Grey's Anatomy or the lyrics to Alabama's Song of the South. Nor do I own any of the quotes from _Gone With the Wind_.

**Chapter 8: Song of the South**

_Gone, Gone with the wind_

_Ain't nobody looking back again_

Dan was trying to sleep off his late night in the on-call room. He kept drifting in and out of sleep on the uncomfortable mattress, if it could be called that. It seemed more like an inch of batting confined by a squeaky plastic. He was thinking about her, Mel. He remembered what life as an intern was like. The chance of running into her around town was slim to none. He wished he would have asked which hospital she was at. "_Could of, should of, would of," _ran through his head as he drifted back to sleep.

Within fifteen minutes his sleep was interrupted again, by a voice. "What are we doing in here?" Was it her? No, he must still be sleeping.

Another voice came from beneath his line of sight. "Melanie." So it was her. "We're in here so I can apologize."

"Apologize?" Her voice sounded cold and cruel. "What is that again, Clark?" Neither one of them knew they were being listened to from one of the upper bunks.

"It's where I realize I was an idiot and say I'm sorry." Clark replied sincerely. "We're obviously meant to be together if we both ended up in the same hospital."

Melanie shook her head and looked down, "I don't think so. I can't just ignore the way you treated me."

"That was over two years ago. I was young and stupid." Clark said

"What about yesterday? The first thing you say to me in 2 years is how I used my family to get an internship here."

"I'm sure once people find out, they'll have the same suspicions." He replied.

Melanie stared him cold in the eyes. "By then, everyone will know that I'm here because I am that damn good of a doctor. I graduated first in my class from Cornell and UB. I deserve to be here. And that's not all. If we're 'meant to be' why didn't you treat me that way back then." Melanie's tough exterior broke. "Two years ago I needed someone because I had just made the hardest decision of my life and I felt awful. What did you do? You called me a whore and kicked me out of our apartment."

Up on the bunk Dan just chuckled to himself. The interns' first day and already there was major drama. Clark changed his tone. "Can you blame me, Mel? You had gotten rid of our baby. I was angry and I couldn't stand to look at you. I forgot that you were the love of my life. All I could focus on was that in the eyes of God you were a murderer."

Suddenly tears filled her eyes. Those words were like a slap in the face. "If you're going to put it like that, clearly you haven't changed your mind."

"We could have had a future," Clark said, anger filling in his voice.

"What kind of future?" Melanie's voice asked desperately. "I would have been stuck at home with a baby while you got to live my dreams of being a world class surgeon. It would have been a pretty short future, because I would have grown to resent you and that little baby pretty fast. I thought it was what would be best, for both of us, Clark."

"It wasn't your decision to make. You can't just play God, Mel." The room fell silent as they both just stared at each other.

"I think you should just give me a minute by myself. Maybe you should go back and work." Melanie said finally breaking the silence after what felt like an eternity. "I never thought you'd let it go and that's why we'll never work as a couple again Clark."

Clark looked his old girlfriend in the eyes. "I'll give you some space then, but I think we could make it work. That's why I'm still trying." He left the room banging the door a little louder than intended. Melanie just looked around the room. How dare he throw her decisions in her face and tell her that she hadn't had the right to make them. It wasn't so much that he thought she was wrong. If it had been up to him, she would have never had the choice to begin with. Finally out of anger she kicked the bed beside her.

"Ok, now this is just too much," said Dan as he finally peeked up above the mattress. "Not only do you keep me last night, you keep me from catching up on that sleep before my surgery later."

Mel just stood there with her eyes wide open in shock for a moment. "You should have said something. That was an incredibly personal conversation, one that I know neither Clark or myself appreciated someone over hearing. Didn't your mother teach you any manners?"

Dan just flashed a smile, "Mine did. Did yours?"

Melanie just about had it, "Yes she did. One of the things she taught me was that it isn't polite to eavesdrop on people's private conversations."

"Haven't you heard?" Dan asked, but without giving Mel a chance to respond. "Eavesdroppers hear very informative things." Climbing down from the bed to get closer to her, he told her, "Don't worry your secret is safe with me, I give you my word as a gentleman. But since I now know where you work and that you're not seeing someone else, maybe we could go out for drinks sometime."

Melanie's eyes flamed. "You are a no good," her anger prevented her from thinking of something to say. "A no good cad and you aren't any type of a gentleman either."

"And you miss, are no lady. Don't think I hold that against you," he said in an exaggerated Charleston drawl. "Ladies and Southern belles have never held any charms for me."

"At least I didn't claim to be anything that I wasn't," Melanie said in retort. "Now if you'll excuse me, I actually do have work I have to do." At that Melanie stomped her foot and left the room.

Dan just stood there chuckling to himself. She would come around, eventually. Until then all he could do would be to sit back and watch her.


	9. Change

_I'm sorry it took so long to update. This chapter was surprisingly hard to get started. The lack of reviews really didn't help though. I'm hoping to have the next update sometime in the next week, but we'll see how that works out. _

**Disclaimer**: I do not own the characters or quotes from Grey's Anatomy. Nor do I own the lyrics to Taylor Swift's song _Change_.

**Chapter 9: Change**

_You can walk away and say we don't need this,  
But there's something in your eyes says we can beat this._

The intern's first shift was already a third of the way over and Hannah, Erin and Mel were sitting for a quick dinner. They already felt more bitter about medicine than when they had walked in this morning.

"I got onto Dr. Karev's service this morning," Erin said. "There's the sweetest little baby that someone just left at the front desk this morning. I don't understand how you can shelter a baby for 9 months and then just abandon it."

"At least she left it somewhere safe," Hannah remarked. "How is it doing?"

"Not too bad. I just feel bad that it's going to end up in foster care." Erin replied.

Mel was distracted but mummered, "It's a baby. It'll get adopted and won't know the difference." Hannah just stared at her seemingly insulted, but not saying why. "My patient has a leaking valve, but we can't do surgery because she's pregnant. It'll probably kill her before we can fix it, so I have to go discharge her after confirming she doesn't want the abortion."

"Why did we want to be surgeons again?" Hannah recovered.

"I have no idea," Erin answered. "Did Clark ever find you?" she asked Mel.

"Yes, but this is neither the time nor the place to talk about it." Mel responded. "I have to get going. I'll talk to you all later."

"Ok," Erin said. "How is your shift going?"

"I'm in the ER today. It's been fairly uneventful. I think I diagnosed two fractures and a standard flu. Nothing surgical," Hannah complained. At that her pager went off, "Maybe this will be something interesting. See you later."

"Of course," Erin said, finishing the last of her sandwich before heading back up to the NICU.

Mel had already arrived in her patient's room. "Mrs. Corizone," she said as she gently knocked on the door. "I've come to finish talking about your treatment options."

"Is there anything you can do other than what we discussed before," Maria inquired.

"I'm afraid not. I can't tell you to undergo any procedure that you are not comfortable with, so all I can do is emphasize that under normal circumstances, had we known about your valve, we as your doctors would have advised you to have it repaired before becoming pregnant." Melanie answered.

"It's done now. To have an abortion would be a sin. I am too devout of a Catholic to believe otherwise," the patient asserted. "You wouldn't understand."

"I'm actually a Catholic too, but I believe that God would understand and forgive you," Melanie pleaded. She knew that she was getting close to crossing the line.

"It's a sin of selfishness to put myself before my child," Maria responded. "God may forgive, but I wouldn't forgive myself. Regardless, I have faith."

"Faith?" Melanie asked.

"_Si_, faith. I believe that God will allow me to live long enough to deliver a healthy baby. Then I can have the operation and live long enough to raise that child into a mature, responsible adult," she replied. Melanie saw a look in the patient's eyes that eluded her. It reminded her of her own mother's eyes, years ago when Melanie had lain in a similar hospital bed. However, Melanie recognized it as a look that would never enter her own eyes.

"I hope you're right Mrs. Corizone. I just don't have blind faith like that," she responded.

Maria just smiled, "I'm not blind with faith. I know exactly what this could do to me. I'm just refusing to give that option any foothold in my mind. I'll see you in a few months and you'll see that I'm right."

"If you're sure," Melanie sighed. "I just need you to sign some paper work before we let you go home." She took out the paperwork and laid it on the table. "Just here and here," she indicated. "I'm going to get Dr. Yang and she'll give the final sign off and you can get back to your own bed tonight." Melanie took the stack and went to find Christina. Luckily she wasn't too far away. "Dr. Yang, you were right."

"Of course I was. I'm always right, you should learn that now," she smirked. Chris looked at Mel and saw the look of an intern making their first revelation.

"Are you sure there's nothing we can do?" Melanie queried.

"We can't save them all, Mel. That's something else you should learn now." Christina replied. "Let's get her on her way and I'll let you scrub in on my surgery in an hour."

Melanie felt like she was being treated like a child with a new toy being dangled in front of her in hopes of forgetting about a bump. But it was still a surgery and she'd be the first in her class to get to scrub in. "She already signed her portion." The two walked back towards the patient and made their final discharge. Before Maria left the hospital they had already moved on to a single bypass surgery on a 64 year old male.

The rest of her shift, Melanie spent doing random post and pre-op assignments and sleeping in the on-call room. The other intern's shifts were similar. Erin stayed on her original infant. Being the person she was she had secretly named it Olivia. She knew it was wrong to get so close to a patient, but it had had no one else in the world to stand up for it. Little Olivia had no one person who was willing to advocate for one treatment over another. Erin just placed herself in that position easily. Hannah on the other hand never got a surgical case. She spent her time between pages studying. Hopefully tomorrow, she could impress one of the attendings and get a good case. Clark had ended up being the neuro lackey and ran labs. He had one patient who needed a CT but the case ended up being non surgical and transferred to a neurologist. By hour 36 they were all ready for a quick drink and a few hours in their own bed.

_Please leave a review for inspiration and as always thank you for reading, Jen 3_


	10. Realize

_I'm getting back on track as far as updating goes. So enjoy. I may have the next chapter before the end of the weekend, but if not it won't be up until late next week. I have a crazy amount of writing to do for classes. I can hardly believe I'm only on Chapter 10. I still have so much of this story to write._

**Disclaimer**: I do not own the characters or quotes from Grey's Anatomy. Nor do I own the lyrics to Colbie Caillat's song _Realize_.

**Chapter 10- Realize**

_If you just realize what I just realized,  
Then we'd be perfect for each other  
and will never find another  
Just realized what I just realized  
we'd never have to wonder if  
we missed out on each other now._

Joe rarely needed to look at the clock in the evenings. He could always tell it was 7:30 when the first wave of doctors came in. He also knew that because it was the end of the interns' first 36 hour shift, it would be a busy night. Alex came over to the bar, as he had been doing since he had moved to Seattle. "How's it going Joe," he asked.

"Pretty good Karev. What can I get you tonight?" Joe replied.

"Five beers please," Alex requested. He then took the bottles back to his table where Shepherd, Hunt, Sloan and the new guy were waiting. "So Sloan, how's private practice?"

"Not bad," Mark answered. "There's more money and I get to spend more time with my wife and kids." Turning his attention, "How is Seattle treating you Dan?"

"Pretty good; I just have to thank you again for the opportunity Sloan." Back in New York, Mark had seen Dan's potential. He was one of the few students he had ever really bothered to teach the secrets of plastic surgery to in his career. Karev was one of the other ones, but he ended up going to neonatal.

"Don't thank him until the rain starts," countered Derek. "That's the real test of how much you like Seattle." They all nodded. It took a while for the body to adjust to the constant dampness in the air. "So any questions I haven't answered yet."

Dan thought for a minute, "There actually is. What is the hospital policy on dating staff?"

"Officially, we discourage it. Personally, that's how I met my wife." Derek responded. "Why did you meet someone."

"Maybe," Dan answered. "I have to see how it goes."

"Anyone we know?" Alex joked.

Dan smiled thinking about her, "Probably not, she's an intern."

Alex's eyes narrowed, but Derek just responded, "Just keep the drama at a minimum."

Meanwhile across the bar, out of their attendings sight, Melanie, Erin and Hannah were sitting at a high top table with cocktails. "So Hannah, what brings you to Seattle Grace. There's a really good program in LA."

Hannah thought for a moment. "It's actually personal reasons." She debated for a moment whether or not she wanted to continue. "I'm actually here to find my mother."

Erin whispered, "Your mother?"

"Yeah, well my birth mother. My parents told me when I was eighteen that I was adopted. The last they knew was that she was a resident at Seattle Grace. At some point in the program they lost track of her." Hannah replied gently. "She saved my life when I was 11. I needed a bone marrow transplant and she gave me one. She had never met me, and never got a chance to. I really just want to thank her."

"If you need any help, just let me know. My father has been here since he was an intern and it sounds like he might have been here when your birth mother was here," Melanie offered. "When I was nine, I came to Seattle Grace to get a liver transplant from my dad. I had never met him until that day." She took a sip, "It's hard to not know where you come from."

Hannah just nodded. "So to a happier subject; I'm so excited to move in with you all!"

Erin beamed back, "We're excited to have you living with us. It'll be fun. Like college, except with more work and less drinking." She picked up her drink, "I'd like to suggest a toast." The other girls raised their glasses, "To the future women of medicine. May we keep our sanity."

"Cheers" said the three girls in unison. The bar had cleared a line of sight between their table and the attendings. For a moment Dan and Mel made eye contact. "I'm going to go grab another drink," she said. Dan had a similar conversation at his table. "I'm going to go get the next round guys."

They met up at the bar counter. Melanie offered him a sly smirk. "So I take it you do come here often?"

Not missing a beat he replied, "So do you. Can I buy you a drink?"

"I know what you're thinking," she answered. "If it worked once, it'll work again. I'm here with my roommates. It won't be that easy again."

"I don't want it to be easy," he began. "I want to get to know you. I'm not sure if you realize it but you are absolutely alluring."

"You want a relationship in other words," she concluded. He nodded. "I don't think that's what I'm looking for right now."

"I'm not a bad guy," he argued. "I'm a world class plastic surgeon. I wrote a book. Well, I started a book. I'm a good ol' boy from the country, but still able to travel the social circuit of New York. I think you should give me a chance."

She chuckled, "You forgot a bit of a stalker."

"If you really want me to leave you alone, tell me now and I'll stop," he said.

"I mostly just don't want a reputation. I mean you're my boss," she bandied.

"I'm you're teacher, not your boss," he responded.

Melanie thought about her options for a moment. She could drop him right now, but what if this was what everyone was looking for, dropping right in her lap. "Ok," she stated.

"Ok?" he questioned.

"I'll give you a chance," She informed him. "but I don't want to get too serious."

"Ok," he repeated. He took out his blackberry. "Could I get your number?"

She simply looked at him with that smile again. "You could find me anyway without it," she said before taking the phone and entering in her number. "I'll talk to you soon." She picked up her drink and started to walk away, but she turned back around. "Two things. One don't want three days. I'm not that patient. Also, I wouldn't tell your attending friends you just got my number. Dr. Karev might have a huge problem with you seeing me."

"Why is he your ex?" he questioned lightly.

"No, he's my dad," she stated finally before turning back to her table. "Ladies I think I've got a date."

"Is that the same guy from the other night?" Erin asked.

Mel responded, "It is. I might be making a huge mistake, but it feels right."

"He looks familiar," Hannah said.

"He works at the hospital," Mel answered. They'd find out he was an attending surgeon before long. Why ruin the secret before the first date?

_Please leave a review for inspiration and as always thank you for reading, Jen 3_


	11. Wild at Heart

_Sorry for the long hiatus. It was unintentional. I just had a million and one things going on. Though as a special added bonus I'm making this update a double shot. I hope you all enjoy!_

**Disclaimer**: I do not own the characters or quotes from Grey's Anatomy, nor do I own the lyrics to Gloriana's song _Wild at Heart_.

**Chapter 11- Wild at Heart**

_I just wanna free fall for a while  
That rebel moon is shining  
Those stars burn like diamonds  
Hell bent on chasing down that crazy side  
I'll follow you where you're leading  
To the first sweet taste of freedom  
You got me running baby,  
Wild at heart_

A week had passed since Melanie had agreed to go out with Dan. She was unusually nervous. Though normally she was confident in her actions, something about a first date always made her paranoid. It had been a good year since she had been on a true first date. Dan was taking her out to a nice restaurant tonight. In the locker room, Mel was changing into a cute dress in anticipation. They were going to meet in front of the hospital.

"Nervous?" Erin asked.

Mel grimaced, "Kind of. I don't think I have ever gone out with a one night stand before. Hopefully that won't be too awkward. I don't want him to think I'm some sort of slut."

"I'm sure he won't," Erin replied. "If he was interested enough to ask you out, then he really does want to know you."

Melanie grinned, "I suppose you're right." She checked her reflection one last time. "I have to get going. I'll see you at home."

"You better tell me all the details," Erin said.

"Will do," Mel promised before walking out the door. Right outside of the main hospital doors he was waiting. Melanie saw the bouquet of flowers in Dan's hands and in spite of herself she smiled. A part of her didn't want this to work. She was only an intern. It was too soon to be falling in love, especially with an attending surgeon. She also hated secrets. It was not going to be fun to not be able to brag to her friends that she was dating a world class surgeon. Since he had asked her out, Mel had done a quick Google search. Sure enough, she saw that his method of skin grafts was published in several well-respected medical journals. She also found video of his weekly spots on New York 1, where he would give out simplistic medical advice. The only thing that worried her was the pictures of him and other women; beautiful, modelesque women. Not one of them had appeared shorter than 5'10" or larger than a size 2. Melanie simply didn't fit into those statistics. She was 5' and a size 8. She was average, perhaps a slight bit smaller than average. She would have to get over that though. Certainly the pictures weren't what they looked like or Dan had changed at some point.

Dan saw Mel's smile from a ways away. She simply beamed when she smiled. "I hope you like daisies," he drawled offering his gift to her.

"They're beautiful," Melanie responded, with her eyes glittering. "So where exactly are we going for dinner?"

"I'm going to give you two options. The first is I made a reservation at Union Restaurant. The second is we forget about the reservations and go to my favorite place in Seattle, McKelly's."

Melanie had been to Union before. Clark had taken her there after they had graduated from Cornell together. It was good, but expensive. He had spent a month's worth of paychecks because he had refused to let her split the bill or order anything but the best. It also seemed so typical especially for a first date. "I think we should go with the second option."

Dan smiled a little but held back. He hadn't really expected her to pick the small Irish pub over the fancy restaurant. "You'll like it. They have the best Irish food this side of the Boston."

"That would be great. My grandma Cassidy always made the best food. Sometimes I really miss her stew," she reminisced.

"Well then you're in for a treat," he replied, leading her to his car. The drive to the restaurant was amicable. It was one of those times where two people could talk about everything, but nothing at all. It wasn't until they had already ordered at the pub that Dan broke this pattern, unintentionally. "So what happened to your grandma? If I may ask."

Melanie was taken aback for a moment slightly confused until she remembered what she had said at the hospital. "I just don't see her as often as I did when I was little. She still lives in Iowa. I only get there during the summers. Or at least I did until my internship started."

"When did you move from Iowa?" Dan asked genuinely.

"I moved here when I was 9," she considered telling him more. "My dad lived here and my mom thought it would be best for me to live closer to him. So we packed up and moved west."

Dan could tell by the smile and the pause that there was more to the story. "He must have liked that. I don't have kids but I can imagine it wouldn't be good to have my daughter halfway across the country."

"He didn't exactly know that he had a daughter back in his hometown," she said before she thought. As soon as the last word left her mouth she already regretted it. "My mom didn't tell him. He had left for college and never came back to town. My dad never got along with his father and neither saw any reason to resolve their issues."

"Of course," Dan said as if to drop the subject. The last thing he as a southern gentleman wanted to do was make his date uncomfortable. "So, you must get along pretty well with your mom with it having been just the two of you for so long."

Melanie just stared for a moment when the waitress came with their dinners. "Thank you," she said politely to the waitress. "This looks delicious Dan. You clearly have an excellent taste in restaurants." She had a bite to punctuate her point before returning to his original question, "My mother and I had a falling out a few years back."

Dan spoke softly, "Was it the abortion?"

Melanie had forgotten that Dan already knew about that. There was no use to hiding it, "Yeah. She comes from a very Catholic tradition. We've talked once since the day she found out. I really would rather not take about it though."

"Of course," Dan replied. "I'm sorry for bringing it up. So you're an intern, do you know what specialty you want to get into?"

Melanie smiled, "I do. I always wanted to go into oncology, especially the surgical end of it. Did you always want to go into plastics?"

"Not especially," Dan answered. "My father convinced me it would make me the most money and Dr. Sloan was my attending when I was doing my internship. He thought I was a natural born plastics god and I went with it. I would have probably done general if I had to choose again."

The rest of the evening went without any more awkward conversations or silences. Finally it was the doorstep moment. Melanie knew she couldn't ask him in with Erin and Hannah home tonight. "Look, you're actually a really great guy. I had a great time, but I feel like I should warn you. Crazy runs in my family and I'm not sure if I'm what you're looking for. So if you decide not to ask me for a second date, I might be a bit disappointed but I'd totally understand," she said as she gazed up into his blue eyes.

Dan didn't say anything for a moment. He just reached around her waist and kissed her. It was a kiss that she felt to her very core. It was a kiss that left her dazed and breathless. Breaking away, Dan replied "I think that's your answer. I'd love to take you out again. Besides you're not that crazy." Melanie stood there leaning against her door frame as he walked away. It was then she knew, this wasn't going to be something casual and despite the fact she knew getting involved with her teacher, her boss was wrong, she didn't care. For the first time since she was a teenager, she felt she could just let go.

_Please leave a review for inspiration and as always thank you for reading-__Jen  
_


	12. Closer

_This is a shorter chapter but an emotional one. I truly hope you're all enjoying the story so far. There will be a bit of a climax soon (like next chapter soon) so stayed tune. _

**Disclaimer**: I do not own the characters or quotes from Grey's Anatomy, nor do I own the lyrics to Joshua Radin's song _Closer_.

**Chapter 12- Closer**

_So, we're alone again  
I wish it were over  
We seem to never end  
Only get closer  
To the point where I can take no more_

It had been nearly a month since Dan and Melanie had started dating. They had managed to keep their relationship on the down low. Unless Hannah and Erin were both on call, Mel would stay in his apartment for sleepovers. Melanie was cuddled in his arms and blankets went her cell phone alarm went off that morning. "Baby, I need to get up."

Dan groaned and let her go. "I wish you didn't have to," he said as he watched her pull on the clean clothes that she had brought with her the night before.

"You know what you were getting into when we started this. I'm an intern. I work long hours and wake up at ungodly hours," she chuckled as she leaned down to kiss him.

"You're right," he replied. "So do you want to grab lunch today?"

"I can't. I'm meeting with my mother today," she said as the smile crept away from her face. Her tone became more serious. "She insisted and it's a step. I do kind of miss being able to turn to her."

"It'll work out," he encouraged.

"I hope you're right," she sighed. "I'll see you around hun."

"See you later babe," he murmured before he fell back to sleep.

Melanie arrived at the hospital a few minutes early. She did her pre-rounds and managed to get placed in the ER for that day. When she saw that it was a slow day she could tell that some force was conspiring for her to have a long conversation with her mother. At ten there was no one waiting who she hadn't already referred to someone else. Satisfied with a job well done, she went down to the cafeteria where she knew her mother would be waiting for her.

Kathleen was sitting at the same table she had been when she first told Alex about Melanie. That moment had been imprinted into her mind. She made a pact with herself to say the things she needed to tell Melly. It had been too long for a mother and daughter to not speak. She didn't really count the time at Izzie's because Mel had turned her away before anything could be resolved. Today, they would both be prepared to say what needed to be said.

"Mother," Melanie spoke dragging Kathleen out of her mind. "It's good to see you."

"You look well," Kathleen responded, standing up to hug her daughter. It wasn't a particularly warm one, but it showed promise.

Melanie sat down, "You look bigger. The baby must be doing well."

"He is, only 3 more months." Kathleen answered. "I'll be going on bed rest in two weeks. My age makes it a high risk pregnancy."

"How's Ted? Is he going to be around for that?" Melanie asked.

"He's going to China the day after tomorrow to finish up some business. After that he'll be able to stay home for a while to help with the baby," Kathleen smiled. Melanie nodded back. "Melly, I really wanted to talk to you before I went on bed rest. I think you know about what."

Melanie solemnly said, "Yes. I just don't know where to start."

"When was the last time you went to Mass?" Kathleen solicited.

"The last time I went with you," Mel reacted, slightly taken aback. "Why?"

"Well, I've been talking with Father O'Leary about you and I," Kathleen started. "He made me realize that this fight we've been in isn't worth it."

"I agree," Mel interrupted.

"I'm just worried about you. I think you should go to confession." Kathleen completed.

"Confession?" Melanie snarled. "Mom, I never liked having to tell some priest everything I did wrong. I don't honestly think I have to go."

Kathleen looked down, "I'm never going to condone your decision and I can't forgive you until you ask for forgiveness."

Melanie looked away from her mother for a moment to try and stop the tears. This wasn't what she had been prepared for. Her mother's words felt like an attack rather than the embrace she was expecting. Melanie's pride wouldn't let her show Kathleen that. Instead she snapped back, "What do I have to be forgiven for? Not being you Mother?"

"Now sweetie," Kathleen began.

"No. Don't 'sweetie' me. You haven't changed," Mel gasped. "You just kept judging me and what's more you talked about something I confided in you with someone who I don't trust. I made my choice because it was the right one for me."

"Clark would have married you, I'm sure." Kathleen countered.

"I know, he asked me." Melanie responded. "But here's the thing, I didn't want to marry him. I just wanted to finish medical school, which I wouldn't have been able to do if I had kept the baby. He told me that he didn't want me to." Kathleen stayed quiet. "This was just a giant waste of time."

Kathleen spoke up, "Don't leave yet. I'm not trying to be the bad guy. I just want you to do what is right."

"No, you want me to do what you think is right. I've said it before and I'll say it again, I'm not you. I'm never going to be you and that's that," Melanie asserted.

"Melly, would you just look at things from my perspective for a moment." Kathleen requested.

"What's the point? You already said you're never going to accept my decision because God forbid you ever look at things from my perspective." Melanie looked at her mother in the eyes for a reaction. She was disappointed to see only judgment. "Forget it. If all you're ever going to do is judge me, you can go to hell." Melanie stormed away leaving her half drank coffee.

Kathleen just sat there alone sipping at her tea, tears rolling down her face. It had gone as wrong as possible. It was their fight from three years all over again. Kathleen missed her little girl and she didn't know how to get her back. She only hoped she could fix things before it was too late and she missed too much.

_Please leave a review for inspiration and as always thank you for reading- Jen _


	13. So Small

_So here is the chapter where it all starts to get exciting. I've been writing a lot lately so I have a solid cushion of chapters on my computer waiting to be updated. What are they waiting for? Reviews of course! Please enjoy._

**Disclaimer**: I do not own the characters or quotes from Grey's Anatomy, nor do I own the lyrics to Carrie Underwood's song _So Small_.

**Chapter 13- So Small**

_When you figure out love is all that matters after all  
It sure makes everything else seem so small_

A few days had passed since Melanie had talked with her mother. She hadn't talked about it, but she regretted what she said. Yes, she had been hurt, but she should have known better than to retaliate. Mel wasn't one to regret things, but she regretted those words the instant she had turned away from her mother. Luckily, the hospital had been busy the past couple days and she had barely had enough time to breathe much less think about what she should have said. At the moment she was answering a page, but when she got to the room it was empty or almost empty.

"Dan," she sighed. "You can't keep doing this. I do have work to do."

"I know," he said before giving her a kiss. "And I'm getting better. I just feel like I haven't gotten to talk to you in a few days."

"The hospital's a madhouse. I just haven't had time. You really should understand," she replied, her arms around his waist.

"I do understand," he responded. "How did coffee with your mother go? You never did tell me."

"She hasn't changed," she declared. "I really don't want to talk about it."

Dan nodded his head. "Ok. I did want to talk to you about something though. I've been wondering, do you think it's time to go public?"

"I don't know," Mel stammered.

"You don't know?" he accused.

"I haven't really thought about it. Give me some time, I'll let you know soon," she promised.

Dan was speechless. He wanted to be there for Melanie, but it was like she wouldn't let him in. "Mel, I feel like I'm the only one actually moving in this relationship. If I didn't know better I would think that you didn't want this."

"Of course I do," she pleaded.

"Then can you start acting like it? I want to be able to kiss you and not care about who sees. I want to be able to deliver flowers to your house and not worry about your roommates seeing," he argued. "Do you have anything to say?"

At that her pager started going off. "I have to go." She started to leave, but paused. "I really do want this. I'm just not sure of anything right now."

Her page turned out to fairly simple. It was only stitches. By the time she finished, it was lunch time. She went to her usual table to sit with Hannah and Erin. Since they had started, the three of them had lunch together almost every day. They knew she was dating someone, but they knew nothing more than the absolute basics. His first name and that he was amazing. "Hey Eir, Hannah," she greeted.

"Hey Mel, how's your day going?" Hannah asked. Erin was concentrating on charts for her surgery later.

"Not that great," Melanie responded.

"Your mom?" Hannah asked.

"Not really. Dan and I had a fight," Mel confessed. "He wants to take the relationship public and I'm just not sure. I try to be a private person. I just need to make a decision. How's the search for your mom going?"

"The good news, I got the records I needed," Hannah began. "The bad news, I only got a last name."

"That's not that bad," Mel encouraged. "It's something."

"True," Hannah conceded. "Does your dad know anyone whose last name is Stevens?"

Mel thought for a second, "Well Izzie's maiden name is Stevens, but I think she might be too young. She would have had to be like 16 to be your birth mother."

"I'd want more evidence before I approached anyone about that anyways," Hannah concluded.

"We'll figure it out," Mel heartened.

"Joe's tonight?" Hannah asked.

"I can't. I'm on call tonight." Mel answered. "It's been a busy day. I have been in the ER all day, but there's been nothing more surgical than stitches."

"I'm sure something will come along," Hannah responded.

At once all three pagers went off. That was usually how these lunches ended. Mel went to the ambulance bay. Reilly came up to her, "We have a single vehicle accident coming in."

"What happened?" Mel asked.

"The woman was car jacked and then when the car crashed, she was robbed," he responded. "We're looking at several broken bones and to top it off she's pregnant. It's going to be a challenging case, and I know you're up to it." Melanie was taken aback, Reilly never gave overt praise. It was always hidden in his statements. "Don't make a liar out of me Cassidy."

"Yes sir," she said as the ambulance pulled up. The back door swung open and the EMTs pulled out the stretcher. For the first time in her life Melanie froze completely. For a second she couldn't hear anything but her own heartbeat. "Sir, what's the patient's name," she uttered.

"It's a Jane Doe," the EMT replied.

"Cassidy, get moving. Unless you think you're too good to treat a Jane Doe?" Reilly snarled.

Melanie felt like her feet were stuck in the ground. "No sir," she squeaked. "The patient's not a Jane Doe. Her name is Kathleen Starski."

"How do you know this Cassidy?" Reilly asked.

Melanie gulped, "No matter what I'd always recognize my mother."

"Get the patient into Trauma 1. Cassidy you're off duty now." Reilly barked.

Melanie watched as her mother was rolled into the ER, when it all hit her. It was no longer important what her mother had said or done. Melanie knew in that instant she'd do a million Hail Maries for her mom not to be on that stretcher.

_Please leave a review for inspiration and as always thank you for reading. -Jen _


	14. Cowgirls Don't Cry

_Please enjoy this next chapter._

**Disclaimer**: I do not own the characters or quotes from Grey's Anatomy, nor do I own the lyrics to Brooks & Dunn's song _Cowgirls Don't Cry_.

**Chapter 14- Cowgirls Don't Cry**

_Cowgirls don't cry  
Ride, baby, ride  
Lessons of life are going to show you in time  
Soon enough your gonna know why  
It's gonna hurt every now and then  
If you fall get back on again_

Hannah and Erin stood outside of the on-call room where Melanie had isolated herself. After she had broke down in the ambulance bay, she collected herself only enough to give Dr. Reilly the information he needed before they rushed Kathleen into surgery, to attempt to call her step-father, who was apparently too busy to answer his phone, and to tell her friends she wanted to be alone. They had both tried to go in to comfort her, only to be immediately rebuffed.

"I don't know what to do," Hannah stated. "This isn't healthy. She should want someone there with her."

Erin sighed, "She could be handling it worse. I've known Mel for a while. She just doesn't like to let people see her cry."

"Meyer," Clark shouted, rushing towards the pair. "Where's Mel? I heard about her mom."

"She's in the on-call room, but she's not going to want to see you," Erin replied.

Clark stuttered, "She needs someone and of the three of us I've known her the longest. Until their fight, Mel and Mrs. Starski were closer than any other mother daughter pair I'd ever seen."

Erin squirmed for a moment but Hannah took over, "Clark, I agree she needs someone. You just aren't that someone. The last thing she needs is more drama from you. You should be ashamed that you're using this to try and get back with her." Clark looked down at his feet. Klein had hit the nail on the head. "I'm right aren't I? Go do your actual job. We'll take care of Mel as best as she'll let us."

"Ok," Clark said, admitting defeat before leaving as quickly as he came.

"Good save Hannah," Erin said.

They kept outside the door, working on charts. They were interrupted again, "Meyer, Klein, what are you two doing here?" asked Alex in a harsh voice. "And where is Mel?"

"We're guarding the door for her sir," Hannah muttered. "She wants to be left alone or we'd be in there with her."

"Ok," Alex replied to his daughter's friends. "Meyer, I need you to go to OR 2 and watch the fetal monitor. They have some nurse doing it, but it's a high risk pregnancy and I'd feel better if someone more specialized was doing it."

"Yes Dr. Karev," Erin answered before going to the elevator.

"I'm not leaving sir," Hannah said defiantly. "She needs someone here in case she changes her mind."

"Fine," Alex responded. "I'm going inside. You can sit out here as long as you want or can." Alex slowly opened the door and heard his daughter's muffled tears.

"I told you guys, I want to be alone," Mel sobbed.

Alex spoke up, "Melly. It's me."

"Dad?" she said in a confused voice, lifting her head off the pillow. "What are you doing here?"

"I'm here for you," he replied. "Do you think I could leave my little girl alone right now?" He walked over towards the bunk.

"You should be in surgery," she mumbled.

"It got canceled. They needed the OR," he replied.

"Not that surgery," she whispered. She was trying to get her tears under control. "Why aren't you with mom?"

"I have an intern watching the monitor. She'll be fine," he assured.

Mel stopped her crying to look her father straight into the eyes. "You and I both know she could lose the baby at any moment. Who do you have watching the monitor?"

"Meyer," he answered.

"She's good, but if Mom starts to go into labor, Eir won't be able to stop it. She's not you," she argued.

"Katie would want me to put her child first," he began. "So that's what I'm doing, she would want me to make sure you're all right. Not to sound cruel but losing the baby won't kill her."

"No," Mel responded. "She'll only wish it had. That baby means everything to her." She went quiet for a minute. "She gets to start over. She gets to have one more shot at being a mother and God knows she won't be a grandmother anytime soon."

"They'll page me if they need me," Alex countered.

"Dad, it would make me feel a lot better if I knew that you were in that operating room ready in case something went wrong. It could take minutes for you to get to the OR, minutes she might not have. So please," she requested, "just go and take care of Mom. You can't do anything here anyway."

"I'm not leaving you alone. That wouldn't be right," he uttered. "The only way I'm going up there is if you promise to find someone to sit here with you."

Melanie thought for a moment. He was right as much as she didn't want to admit it. She shouldn't be alone now of all times, but her pride wouldn't let her allow someone to see her at such a low point. It had only ever been her mother who she trusted enough to expose herself to. It was then she realized she had a person now, someone who she knew just wanted her to be true. "Ok, I'll page someone now," she promised.

"Ok," Alex sighed as he kissed her forehead. "If you need me, page me."

Melanie saw the door shut softly behind him as she pulled out her pager. She hoped her person wasn't still mad as she typed the message. She just wanted to let him in.

_Please leave a review for inspiration and as always thank you for reading. -Jen _


	15. Jump then Fall

_Please enjoy this next chapter. _

**Disclaimer**: I do not own the characters or quotes from Grey's Anatomy, nor do I own the lyrics to Taylor Swift's amazing song _Jump Then Fall._

**Chapter 15-** **Jump Then Fall**

_Baby, I'm never gonna leave you_

_Say that you wanna be with me too_

_Cause I'm gonna stay through it all_

_So jump then fall_

Hannah was still sitting outside the door when Dr. Karev had exited. "How is she?" she asked.

"She's doing as well as can be expected. She wanted me to go into her mother's surgery, but she promised she wouldn't be alone right now. So stand by for a page," Alex responded tiredly.

"Of course," Hannah replied. Satisfied, Alex took the elevator to the OR floor. Hannah continued to sit there working away, waiting for a page. A few minutes later a shadow loomed over her. "Dr. McHeath, what can I help you with?"

"Nothing, I just need to go into the on-call room," Dan replied, grabbing for the door knob.

"I wouldn't go in that on-call room," she said. "I'm not sure if you had heard but Dr. Cassidy's mother was brought in earlier and since then she's holed herself in there."

"I had heard about Dr. Cassidy," he answered as he went to go into the room.

"She really just wants to be left alone right now," Hannah countered. "She kicked her own father out. I don't think she's going to want her attending in there with her."

Dan looked at the intern, "I think Dr. Cassidy wants me in there. If she doesn't she'll kick me out, don't worry." With that being said he walked into the room and shut the door behind him, leaving one very confused Hannah outside. "Baby," he crooned softly. Melanie lifted her head and opened her mouth to say something but all that came out was another sob. Almost at once, he was sitting on the bunk next to her, her head cradled in his arms. He knew now wasn't the time to say anything. He could tell that all she wanted was a shoulder to cry on.

Finally Melanie said something not lifting her head off of his chest, "I'm so sorry you wasted your time."

"This is where I want to be right now. Everything else can wait," Dan responded.

"No, I mean with us," she whispered. "You deserve so much better than me."

Dan was shocked for a moment. "How can you say that? I just barely deserve you. You are the most amazing woman I have ever been with. You're a kind, passionate, wonderful, intelligent person unlike any I have ever met."

"You're wrong, I'm a horrible, horrible person," Melanie cried. "Do you know what the last thing I told my mother was?"

"I'm sure you didn't mean it, whatever it was," he comforted.

"But do you know what it was?" Melanie repeated. Dan didn't answer. "I told my mother, my saintly turn the other cheek mother, to go to hell." The tears starting rolling down her face again. "And you're wrong. For that second, I meant it. I meant it with every fiber of my being. My mother had hurt me, so I wanted to hurt her. I was expecting her to accept my decisions, but she just made me feel worse about myself again. I regretted saying that as soon as I turned my back to leave, but I didn't turn around and say I was sorry. I didn't even try to call her to apologize for crossing the line. No, I just kept walking."

"I'm sure she knows you didn't mean it," he replied as he continued to hold her.

"All she wanted me to do was go to Confession, maybe a mass or two," she continued. "God's punishing me. He knows I haven't been to church in years and after what I said to Mom, He's taking her away. I don't deserve her anymore. Before you know it, He'll be finding some way to take you away too. So you may as well leave me now."

"Now Mel, you know that's not true," he reasoned, but Melanie just continued to cry in his arms, not saying a word. Gently he stroked her hair, trying to do all he could to make her feel better. "All I can do is promise not to leave you until want me to."

Melanie rose her head up off his chest, "But I don't want you to leave me, ever. I love you," she said sweetly, simply. "I know what I said earlier that I didn't know about us. This just put things into perspective. I want to be able to tell my friends how truly amazing you are. I want to be able to bring you home to my parents. Sure my dad might be mad at first but he'll realize how in love we are."

"Whatever you want sweetheart," he replied earnestly. "Right now don't worry about it. You just need to do what you think you have to."

Melanie thought about it for a moment while listening to Dan's heartbeat against her ear. "Did I ever tell you about exactly why Mom and I moved to Seattle?" Dan shook his head no. "I had cancer when I was about 7. I fought it, kicked its ass and went into remission."

"Is that why you want to go into oncology?" Dan queried.

"Yeah," Mel answered before continuing. "When I was 9 we found out that I needed a liver transplant. My mother tried but she wasn't a match and she realized she couldn't do it alone anymore. So we hopped a plane to Seattle and she finally told Dad that I existed. That day, he gave me a part of his liver." Melanie went quiet for a minute. "I remember every day I was sick, she would pray for me. It was our tradition before surgery to do a Hail Mary and it worked every time." Dan saw the trace of a smile flicker across her face only to disappear as rapidly as it had come. "Do you have to do anything right now?" Mel asked.

"Only what you want me to," Dan answered.

"Can you drive me to Annunciation?" she requested. "It's not that far and there's something I have to do."

"Of course sweetheart," he replied. Melanie stood up and dried her eyes with her scrubs. Hand in hand they walked out of the on-call room. Not speaking to anyone, they made their way to Dan's car and to the old Catholic church.

_Please leave a review for inspiration and as always thank you for reading. -Jen _


	16. Ave Maria

_Please enjoy this next chapter. It's reminiscent of Chapter 11 of Wouldn't be this Way, the prequel to this story. Please leave a review for inspiration and as always thank you for reading. -Jen _

**Disclaimer**: I do not own the characters or quotes from Grey's Anatomy, nor do I own the lyrics to Beyoncé's song _Ave Maria_.

**Chapter 16- Ave Maria**

_You are my heaven on earth.  
You are my hunger, my thirst  
I always hear this voice inside  
Singing Ave Maria_

Annunciation was the church that Melanie and Kathleen, but mostly Kathleen, had gone since they had moved to Seattle. As Melanie walked into the sanctuary, she could see that almost nothing had changed. It was the same wooden pews she had fidgeted in as a child. It was the same smoky scent from the incense that would make her nose start running before long. She had asked Dan to stay near the back. She needed a bit of privacy as she kneeled in the third pew on the right; the one where she had spent numerous Sunday mornings. She dug through her purse to find the rosary that she knew would always be there. It may not have seen the light of day in a few years, but her grandmother always said that you never knew when you'd need to pray, so Mel kept it with her always.

Quietly she started to do a rosary. Even if it would take hours, she would count and pray on every bead. "In the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit," she said crossing herself. "I believe in God the Father Almighty, Creator of Heaven and Earth," she stopped her mind was going blank. Maybe it had been too long. Muttering the beginning of the creed, she felt someone behind her.

"Can I help you, Child?" asked the old Priest.

Melanie looked at him, "I need to make a confession Father. Would that be possible?"

"Of course," he said as he led her to the Confessional. They walked to the opposite sides of the booth to be separated by the screen.

She crossed herself again and began, "Bless me Father, for I have sinned. It's been about three years since I last went to Confession." Though the ritual usually made her nervous, for once the tradition brought her comfort.

"What is troubling you my child," came the voice.

Melanie let a tear run from her eyes but maintained her composure otherwise. "I have been a bad Christian. I break the Third Commandment all the time by working on Sundays, but I'm a doctor so I'm doing the Lord's work. I have broken the Sixth Commandment. I've slept with men who I wasn't married to and had no intention of marrying. I've changed that though. I broke the Fifth Commandment and had an abortion. I feel that the Lord will forgive me. Oh, and I swear entirely too much"

"Is that all?" the priest asked.

"No," she replied. "Of all my sins, the one that I am the most sorry for is I have dishonored my mother. I have said things I didn't mean and treated her worse than I would treat any acquaintance. That's the big one. Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, a lowly sinner."

"I could tell you to go to Mass everyday for a month and to do 5 rosaries every day, but I won't. If you're sorry, and I mean truly sorry, then you will find some way of your own to make up for your sins," he told her. "God, the Father of mercies, through the death and resurrection of his Son has reconciled the world to himself and sent the Holy Spirit among us for the forgiveness of sins; through the ministry of the Church, may God give you pardon and peace, and I absolve you from your sins in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit."

"Amen," she responded. "Thank you Father. Also would you pray for Kathleen Starski? She's in the hospital and could really use the prayers."

"Of course," he replied. They both walked out of the booth. "Kathleen is one of my frequent parishioners. She comes to me quite a bit."

Melanie looked at him again, "You must be Father O'Leary." He nodded his head. "I'm actually Kathleen's daughter. My mother has said good things about you. We've been having issues for a while now."

"I hope you get a chance to resolve them," the Father responded.

"I do too. Thank you again," she said shaking his hand. She then started walking back to Dan.

Dan went to hug her, "How did it go?"

"Not bad," she answered. "Before we go I just have to do one more thing." Dan nodded and Mel kneeled in the pew. "Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee. Blessed art thou among women and blessed is the fruit of your womb, Jesus Christ. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now. Amen."

"You forgot the last line," Dan said after the amen.

"No I didn't," she replied. "We never said the last line while I was sick. I never understood why, but I think I do now. I can't bring myself to even imagine that my mother is going to die eventually. It could be the hour of her death now." Melanie's eyes got misty. "How could I even say those words at this moment? I think I'm ready to go back to the hospital now."

"Ok," Dan replied. Quietly they made their way back to Seattle Grace. He dropped her off at the door and went to park the car.

Inside the doors, Izzie was waiting for Melanie. "Mel, where have you been?" she inquired.

"Church, Iz. I just needed to do something for mom," Melanie answered. "Why, is something wrong?"

"No," Izzie assured her. "Your dad was just worried about you. They're all still in surgery."

"Still? She's been in surgery for hours!" Melanie exclaimed.

"They're just doing a thorough job," Izzie said. "Callie finished setting her bones. Your dad hasn't had to do much of anything. The baby's fine. Bailey is just taking care of some internal bleeding. That shouldn't even be much longer. How did you get to the church anyway? You shouldn't be driving when you're upset."

"Dan drove me," Noting Izzie's confused expression, she continued. "My boyfriend."

"Oh, anyone I know?" Izzie queried.

"Yes, but I'd rather not say until I tell Dad," Melanie responded.

"Fair enough," Izzie replied. Her pager then went off. "That's Bailey. She just finished up. Your mom's going to be in 2398. You could probably sit in there for a while."

"I think I'll do that," Mel reacted. She then went up to her mother's room.


	17. Whatcha Say?

_I was truly inspired by the song Whatcha Say? for this chapter. Not so much Jason Derulo's original version but Lisa Scinta's cover. Look it up on youtube. I feel like it captures the regret in this chapter. It's a short chapter, but it was also an incredibly difficult chapter for me to write. Please leave a review for inspiration and as always thank you for reading. -Jen _

**Disclaimer**: I do not own the characters or quotes from Grey's Anatomy, nor do I own the lyrics to Jason Derulo's song _Whatcha Say?_

**Chapter 17-Watcha Say**

_Mmm that you only meant well?  
Well of course you did… _

_I was so wrong for so long  
Only trying to please myself_

Melanie was pouring over the chart that she had managed to steal from the nurses' station; her mother's chart. She shouldn't have been allowed to just take it but there was no one who was really going to stop her. By this point everybody knew what the situation was. Mel could hardly walk down the hall to the bathroom without overhearing people talking about her in a pitying tone or worse. The worst was the people who offered her sympathy and told her "if you need anything…" She knew it would be rude to shout down their offers with "I need my mother to be ok, but I don't think you can do that." No, she had too much class to do that. Instead she answered with the polite "Thank you, I'll keep that in mind," and continued on her way. She knew that she shouldn't be mad at her colleagues for just wanting to be there, but she was angry at the world right now. Ted still hadn't called her back despite the twenty odd voice messages she had left telling him that something was wrong and he needed to call her immediately. She had even tried to call her step-sister, but Olivia had apparently changed her phone number.

She was angry at the man who put her mother here. She knew that despite their estrangement, Kathleen would never purposely hurt someone. Whoever did this to Kathleen was a cold hearted bastard. Melanie knew the police were looking for him, but they had almost nothing to go on. All they had was the gun he had threatened her mother with and left in the car in a panic. She could only imagine the cold panic her mother must have felt as she was forced to drive to an unknown destination. She shivered at her imagination.

Both Kathleen and the baby had made it through the surgery all right. They weren't completely out of the woods yet, but their situation was hopeful. Melanie sat alone in the room. Dan had to get back to work. She had nowhere else to be, so there she sat for hours. She stared towards her mother, thinking of all the words she had left unsaid, the regrets she had over the years. All of a sudden she was sobbing, "I'm so sorry Mom." She was almost positive that her mother was deaf to her tears and apologies, but she couldn't let it go any longer. "I was wrong. I shouldn't have said the things I said, I know that now and I'm so, so sorry. I wish I could take it back, all of it." Her tears caught up with her and she couldn't say anything. It was a heart wrenching image of a daughter fearing the worse. Melly had morphed into a scared little girl and four years of medical school wasn't convincing her that everything was going to be all right. She couldn't picture it. Her mother was still lying lifeless in the austere hospital bed with a tube down her throat. Melanie's eyes were watching the floor. "You only were trying to look out for me. I acted like a spoiled brat. I hope you can hear me, because I mean this."

That was when she heard a gasping noise from the bed. "Mom?" she looked and saw her mother trying to breathe against the tube. She leapt out of the chair, pressing the emergency button. "Relax; the tube was helping you breathe." The nurse and a third year resident entered the room to remove the ventilator. Melanie held her breath for a moment, releasing it only when her mother took her first solo breath since entering the room. "You don't need to say anything. I was afraid I wouldn't get this chance." The tears silently fell down her face, but she was smiling. Kathleen took Melanie's hand, not effortlessly, and gave it a gentle squeeze. Their eyes met and both knew that all was forgiven. Nothing else needed to be said.


	18. I Wonder

_This chapter leaves Melanie for Hannah's subplot. I can't say much more without major spoilers but she finds the answers she's been looking for much to the surprise of several characters. Please leave a review for inspiration and as always thank you for reading. -Jen _

**Disclaimer**: I do not own the characters or quotes from Grey's Anatomy, nor do I own the lyrics Kellie Pickler's song _I Wonder._

**Chapter 18**- **I Wonder**

'_Cause I look in the mirror_

_And all I see are your brown eyes staring back at me_

_They're the only thing you ever gave to me at all_

Hannah had just found out that Kathleen had woken up. Melanie had called her excitedly. Not much was said between the two friends, because Mel just wanted to get back to her mom. Hannah didn't think about her own birth mother too often, but the past few months of searching made her wonder if it was all in vain. Could it be possible that Stevens, whoever she was, had died after the bone marrow transplant. Putting aside her thoughts she laid on the hard bed in the on-call room hoping for a few hours rest before her shift began, but no sooner than she shut her eyes it felt like she had go change into a fresh set of scrubs and get back to work.

Rounds seemed to drag on without Melanie to blurt out the answers. She had been given the week off to deal with her mother. Those remaining had their thoughts with her. Even Clark, who Melanie spoke to as little as possible, was still concerned about his colleague. They spent far too much time together for it to not affect them when one was going through such an ordeal. Despite this they all went about their normal routines.

It was around noon when Hannah's cell buzzed. Without looking at the caller ID, she answered, "Hannah Klein, how may I help you?"

"Dr. Klein, it's Steve Delow," the voice on the phone responded.

Hannah recognized the voice of the private investigator she had hired in her search. "Yes, Mr. Delow. Did you find anything new?"

"I hit the jackpot," he replied. "I think I found everything you need to confront your mother. I can bring the brief to the hospital anytime today."

She could hardly believe it. "I'll be going on a lunch break in about half an hour. The lobby as usual?"

"I'll see you soon," he answered before hanging up the phone.

Hannah worked diligently for the next thirty minutes praying that she wouldn't get pulled in on an emergency code, but they went by uneventfully. She soon found herself face-to-face with the investigator. "Mr. Delow, it's good to see you again."

"You too Dr. Klein," he replied handing her the envelope. She shifted through the papers inside as he explained, though it needed little explanation. "I found out her first name, Isobel. She changed her name about seventeen years ago to-."

"Karev," Hannah interrupted finding the wedding announcement inside. "Thank you."

"I can find out what she's doing now if you want," he offered.

Hannah shook her head, "That won't be necessary."

"I also found your original birth certificate for further proof," he said. "You have everything you need if you want to find her."

She looked at him, "Thank you. I really appreciate it."

"Of course," he responded. "It's been a pleasure." The two parted ways.

Hannah went to find Erin, no need to bother Mel now. She finally found her on the second floor. "I have the answer."

"I didn't have a question," Erin replied.

"My birth mother," Hannah said. "It's Dr. Karev."

Erin's eyes opened wide. "The she-Karev?"

"No, Mel's dad," Hannah snarked. "Of course the female Karev."

"Are you sure?" Erin asked.

Hannah took out the birth certificate, "It's all here. Now I don't know what to do."

"What do you think you should do?" Erin responded. "She must have had her reasons."

"Do you think it's wrong for me to want to know?" Hannah questioned.

Erin thought carefully, "No. Just try not to attack her when you do it." Erin's pager went off. "I have to go. She doesn't have anything on the board today, just so you know."

Hannah didn't act upon her urge to go find the female Dr. Karev. There was too much work to do at the moment with Melanie's absence. She finally got off of her shift at 9:30, only 3 hours late, and went to Joe's. After the day she had she could use a drink. When she arrived she could see that another blonde doctor had had the same idea. Taking the barstool next to her, Hannah decided to start the conversation. "Good evening Dr. Karev," she said.

"Rough day, Dr. Klein?" Izzie asked. "I know Mel's off."

"Yeah," Hannah responded. She received her usual drink and took a sip, contemplating her next move. "Can I talk to you about something kind of personal?"

Izzie thought for a moment and remembered how Mel had told her that Klein was a complete transplant to Seattle. "Sure, but call me Izzie if you do."

"Izzie," Hannah started, relishing how the name rolled off her tongue. "This may seem insanely personal, but I'm adopted." Izzie didn't say anything, so Hannah continued. "I've been looking for my birth mother for years and today I finally found all the information I need."

"That's great," Izzie said reluctantly, wondering for a moment if her first child ever looked for her. She had never regretted giving up her daughter, but had always wished she could see how she had grown up, especially after she had given up some of her bone marrow.

"I don't know what to do," Hannah replied. "I know she has this whole other life without me. She's married and has kids and some high powered career, I'm sure. I don't want to take that away from her, but I want to know where I come from. I owe her my life, in more ways than one. If it weren't for her I would have died when I was eleven. What would you do?"

"I don't know what I'd do in your shoes," Izzie said, treading carefully. "But I do know if I gave up my baby, I'd be honored if she spent the time you did to try and find me."

Hannah let the response mull over her head briefly before putting the birth certificate on the bar in front of them. Before Izzie could look down, Hannah spoke up, "Your maiden name is Stevens and your middle name is Katherine." Izzie stared at Hannah in confusion and realized their eyes were identical. "I'm your daughter."


	19. Fifteen

_This chapter continues where the last one left off. It really explores Izzie's past more than I have ever done. There are also a few flashbacks in italics. Please leave a review for inspiration and as always thank you for reading. -Jen _

**Disclaimer**: I do not own the characters or quotes from Grey's Anatomy, nor do I own the lyrics to Taylor Swift's lyrics _Fifteen._

**Chapter 19- Fifteen**

_**Back then I swore I was gonna marry him someday  
But I realized some bigger dreams of mine…**_

_**'Cause when you're fifteen and somebody tells you they love you  
You're gonna believe them**_

Izzie just stared into Hannah's eyes. "I shouldn't have said anything," the younger woman muttered. "Stupid. I'm sorry; I'll just go." Hannah got up to leave.

"No. Stay," Izzie said stopping her. "I'm just surprised, that's all." She thought for a moment. "I thought I'd never get this opportunity and now that I have it I don't know what to say." They both sat there silently, thoughtfully.

"Why?" Hannah asked, finally breaking the ice.

"Why I gave you up?" Izzie asked and received a nod. "I was sixteen. I grew up in a trailer park. I didn't know my dad. My mom spent all our money on psychics. And Chehalis is a place I always knew I wanted to escape." Izzie thought for a moment. "Most of all I didn't love him."

Izzie could still remember the lonely feeling of discovering she was pregnant. She had only been dating Clay for a few months. He was eighteen to her fifteen almost sixteen. She had gone farther than she had ever intended to with him. Two months after they had had sex for the first time, she realized she was late. She could remember that conversation like it was yesterday.

"_So, I'm late," Izzie stated bluntly sitting in Clay's truck after their date of going to the movies._

"_I thought your curfew wasn't until 12:30," he replied. "It's only 11, we have plenty of time babe." He leaned in for a kiss._

_Izzie turned her head. "Not that kind of late. I mean I think I might be pregnant." He said nothing. "I have an appointment at the clinic tomorrow after school."_

"_Who is he?" Clay asked suddenly._

"_Who?" she asked confused._

"_The father," he responded. "I put on a condom every time, so it can't be me."_

"_It must have broke one time because there's no one else. I love you," Izzie said insulted. _

"_If you say so," he replied. "Do you want money for an abortion? I'll drive you to Seattle."_

"_No," she said. _

"_I'm leaving Chehalis next month for college," he stated. "I'm not coming back to be stuck in a trailer park for the rest of my life with a litter of brats."_

"_Do you think that's what I want? I should have never…"she trailed off. _

"_Well you did. You can do whatever you want, but I'm not paying for a baby for the rest of my life," he said._

"_Whatever, just drive me home." Izzie said. The ride home was silent except for the song on the radio. It was to cheery for the moment but neither moved to change the station. As he pulled in front of her trailer, Izzie paused for a moment before leaving. "I thought you were someone else. Clearly I was wrong. I'm done. Don't worry about calling me ever again." She slammed the door behind her. That night she cried into her pillow all night. The next day she found out she was definitely pregnant. _

_Word had gotten around fast that she had found herself in a spot of "trouble." At school, her once wide group of friends had dwindled to the few other girls in the home making classes; the ones that were meant for the girls without any hope of escaping the trailer park. The only teacher who still saw something in her was Dr. Singer, her biology teacher. She would spend lunch in his class room. _

"_So only one more month of school," she said one day. "Then I guess I'm done."_

"_Isobel, I don't think it's my place, but you do know you don't have to keep the baby," Dr. Singer replied._

"_Even if I wanted one, it's way too late for an abortion."_

"_No, I mean adoption," he said._

"_I don't know how to get in touch with anyone about that," she replied._

"_One of my friends from college runs an adoption agency, I can give you her number," he replied._

"_Thanks," she said accepting the digits. For the first time since she thought she was pregnant she had hope. The adoption agency had helped her find the Kleins who lived in California. One the day she went into labor she met them in person for the first time and was satisfied with Sarah's parents. Of course, they changed her name to Hannah, but she could see they loved her as much as she did. It didn't break her heart to see them hold her baby. It felt like it was theirs, in all their minds. _

"So that's it. You just gave me up?" Hannah said.

Izzie nodded. "I still believe to this day that what I did was right. Look at you." Hannah broke eye contact. "You are everything I wanted you to be. I haven't known you long and the time I have, you were just another intern, but you are a standout intern; one of the very best. And from what Mel tells me, you are an amazing friend. You even bake pretty well. Maybe you would have become that person if I raised you, who knows? But I am so proud of what you've accomplished."

"You are?" Hannah asked. "When I was eleven and I was here, why didn't you ask to meet me?"

Izzie looked confused. "I did. I wanted to see you so badly, but your parents said that when they asked you, you were too tired and I accepted that."

"They never told me about you," Hannah replied. "Until I was eighteen I thought that the bone marrow transplant was random. They didn't even tell me I was adopted until that day. I remember when I stumbled across the picture of you holding me the day I was born before you gave me to them."

_Hannah was going through old pictures in a box that had been coated with a thick layer of dust. She was going to make her mom a scrapbook for her birthday during winter break. This box was her baby pictures. She smiled as she looked at her baby brown eyes and barely there blonde hair. There were pictures with her mother, her father, and her grandparents. Pictures with everyone who mattered in her life. Even though some people had changed, she could indentify everyone. That was when she found one person she couldn't identify. It was a young blonde girl holding a newly born baby that Hannah could only assume was her. The girl looked tired, hardly able to smile for the camera. A nurse was hovering over her shoulder as if waiting to take the baby back. She was unrecognizable but at the same time there was something that looked familiar. Maybe it was the tired eyes, or the hair limp with sweat. Hannah took the picture and went downstairs._

"_Dad," she said. "I was working on mom's present and I found this."_

_He took the 3 by 5 and looked at it. "Where did you find this?"_

"_With my baby pictures. Is that me?" she asked._

"_It is," he said. "Why don't you go and wash up? Your mom should be home any minute with dinner."_

"_Ok," Hannah replied, not thinking anything more. _

_She didn't hear her father tell her mother as she walked through the door "We need to tell her." She didn't see the look of anxiety on both of their faces. When she came down stairs and sat at the table she only noticed their strange expressions. _

"_Hannah dear, we need to talk," her mother said. _

"_About what?" Hannah replied. _

_Her parents exchanged a look, "We've been keeping something from you. We were waiting for the right time, but it seems now is as good a time as any," her father said. Hannah shrugged. "You're adopted."_

_Hannah nearly spit out the water she had just drank. "What?"_

"_We wanted to tell you," her mother said. "But it never seemed right. We were always afraid of doing the wrong thing."_

"_How could you not tell me?" Hannah asked. "You've had eighteen years. No matter what you are still my parents. You've been the ones there for me all along; no one could ever replace you."_

"_There's one more thing," her mother added. "Remember when we were in Seattle when you were eleven?"_

"_How could I forget?" Hannah replied. "If it weren't for the transplant I would have died."_

"_Your birth mother was the donor," her father said. "Your mom and I didn't think the timing was right so we didn't tell you."_

"_So you know who she is?" Hannah asked._

_Her parents looked at each other. "We lost her information years ago. When we moved it got lost in the shuffle."_

"_Oh," Hannah said. "She never asked to meet me?"_

"_No, she thought it would be best to let you live your life without her," her father said._

"And I accepted that," Hannah said completing the story. "Obviously that wasn't true."

"If you want, we can try to catch up. I'd love to get to know you better," Izzie said.

"I would like that," Hannah responded. "Do you want to have dinner sometime?"

"Sure," Izzie said.

"I should probably go home soon though," Hannah said. "I haven't been home in almost 3 days."

"Of course," Izzie replied. "I'm glad you told me."

"I'm glad I found you," Hannah smiled before leaving the bar. Somehow she knew things were going to work out.

_I appreciate everyone to take the time to read. I'm going to take a hiatus from this story for a while to focus on other projects. There's more to the story, I'm just not sure how to get there from here. Thanks, Jen._


End file.
